A Fickle Pickle

Be still, and know that I am God

2012-01-10T11:21:00.003-07:00

So, I had a dream last night, and as I reviewed it in the morning I think it was, if not an answer to a current challenge, at least a direction to go in. This is probably more personal than blog worthy, but as this is my journal... C'est la vie

As a prologue: I am currently in the midst of a personal challenge in which I do not exactly understand or agree with a decision that is being made by my bishopric, regarding me and my current YW calling. It is extremely frustrating to me and has left me feeling hurt, unappreciated, under valued, unwanted, and ok, I'll say it... really quite ticked off! Even as I say that out loud, KNOW THIS - I sustain my priesthood leaders, I am praying for patience and understanding, and even without clear understanding, I WILL DO what they ask me to do. (I just happen have this insatiable need to understand WHY... and sometimes those answers are a long time in coming. And let's be honest, I have more than my fair share of PRIDE and tend to be a bit of a control freak in many areas)

another piece of prologue: about 8 years ago I served in the YW program in this ward, and while I hope that I helped all of the girls in some way during the time I served with them, there was one girl, I'll call her DEE, in particular who I felt was the reason I had been called at that time. She was walking the line - shaky at best in her testimony, and making decisions that would not take her down a path of true happiness. I watched her grow, and I was privileged to see her make the crucial decision to choose to "stay on the path." Once her decision was solid, I had the strong impression my "job" was done. Sure enough, about 3 or 4 weeks later I was released. How grateful I am that I could play at least a small part in helping this special young woman. I love her dearly. I was blessed to be there in the temple as she was sealed to her eternal companion, we are still in touch and she and her good husband are raising their little family in the gospel.

NOW back to my dream. In this dream, Dee and her husband had gone hiking and were lost on the mountain. It had been several days, lots of search parties, but no luck. I was out on the mountain searching and I had in my mind a plan of where it made the most sense to look. I was heading that direction and was certain I would find them. Then I stopped and realized I hadn't asked for the Lord's direction. I stopped and did so. The scene changed, and we were now on Y mountain. (dreams aren't really supposed to make sense, right?) I was standing on the Y and was impressed to just simply walk a short distance to the south. There they were. Dee and her husband, injured, but they would be fine. They were right there, easy to see, and it made no sense that they hadn't been found.

End of the dream. I woke up and though about all the silly, random things in the dream (many unmentioned above) that didn't make sense, and what was going on in my mind that would cause me to dream about that.

Then the thought came that sometimes (ok, most of the time) I am pretty sure that I know exactly what the RIGHT thing to do is, I know what the Lord wants done, and by golly - I'm going to get it done! When I was set apart for my calling I was told that one reason I was called was to "be an example to the other leaders of how to roll up your sleeves and get to work." I have honestly done my best to do that. I have looked for things that needed to be done and I have done my best to DO them. I have worked hard to be a moving force (hopefully for good). Perhaps I have tried too hard to be and do too much. Perhaps it is time to slow down and let the Lord take the reins. I believe that right now the Lord is trying to teach me that HE is the moving force, I am simply a tool. HE know what needs to be done and I need to let HIM lead. I don't have to understand, I just need to ask for guidance and obey. In short, I need to follow the counsel, "Be still, and know that I am God."

trap 3

2012-01-02T15:56:00.017-07:00

and here we have the "falling tire of death" trap. (yes, there is a common "death" theme in all of the trap names)

My favorite part of this one is "get out of my way, stick!"

another trap...

2012-01-02T15:55:00.000-07:00

This one is called the "falling boards of death" trap

BEWARE: no trespassing on our playground!

2012-01-02T13:52:00.001-07:00

My boys have been outside building traps all morning. Aaron was taking videos (with the new camera that he got for Christmas) and when I saw them - I just LOVED them and had to share. I feel confident that if we ever need to "secure" our home, these boys will be up for the challenge! burglars (or rogue slide-ers) BEWARE!!!! (I thought in particular that the MT. cousins would enjoy them.) One of my favorite parts is when they warn that this is dangerous stuff and "kids" "shouldn't try this at home." Enjoy!

Apparently the videos are too large to post all in one entry, so my apologies to those of you with the google reader feeds who will be getting all the different updates...

a new vocabulary word... that made me laugh...

2012-01-01T18:53:00.000-07:00

so, I was playing online scrabble with a friend and she played the word "puli." My thought was "no way is that a real word!" so I googled it and got a good laugh from the photos that were pulled up.

Apparently, a Puli is a type of Hungarian herding dog. Looks a lot like a MOP to me, and the pictures of them jumping just crack me up: (I've googled them several times now, just cause think they are hilarious, and still can't help but laugh... hope they bring a smile to your face, and a new vocabulary word to use in scrabble!)

Yup, I'm still laughin' FLYING FURBALL!!!!

brrr....

2011-10-06T12:44:00.001-06:00

just in case you are wondering... I am COLD today!

We have been having beautiful (almost too hot) fall weather up until just a few days ago... even yesterday was ok until about noon, then it started raining and the cold front moved in. Right now it is 38* and when there is a slight break in the cloud cover, I see snow on the mountains not too far above my house!

... and I am COLD!

Katrina's baptism is this weekend, and we will be having a light luncheon afterwards, so I am thinking today is a great day to do some BAKING. Nice WARM, yummy smelling, heat up the house, BAKING.

General Conference & Cascade Springs

2011-10-02T13:12:00.000-06:00

So yesterday between conference sessions we drove up to Cascade Springs. I knew the leaves had begun turning and I wanted to see them before they all fell off. We watched most of the morning session before leaving, and listened to the last talk while we drove. We had a picnic lunch and hiked around the springs and pools until 2:00, then we listened to the first half of the afternoon session while we drove home. (well, some of us listened - some fell asleep.

Promptings FOR ME from Saturday's talks were:
* Increase my diligence and efforts in Scripture study - particularly the Book of Mormon,
* "Have you inquired of the Lord?" - seeking answers from the Lord to my questions or problems, instead of other sources.
* That happiness comes by living a Christ-like life
* Encourage my YW to learn about and participate in Family History
* Look up - look to God to lift us. (look up, cheer up, God want me to be happy)
*** Learn to master my TIME. Set goals, then master the skills to achieve the goal) Reminder that some distractions need to be turned to dust (as the seer-stone)

Although I had mixed feeling about the outing, since it is harder to focus and listen to the talks while driving, (Tim is the only one who can read/take notes, etc... while in a moving car. The rest of us get motion sick.) it was beautiful and a nice break from the routine. (and I rationalized that I can always re-listen & re-read)

Here are some pictures:

Love this thought

2011-09-30T16:21:00.000-06:00

I wish every teacher had this posted in their classroom, and every parent had it posted in their home... I know I need to be better at remembering it...

4th quarter come back - (taken from middle-aged mormon man)

2011-09-29T11:18:00.004-06:00

a friend of mine posted a link on facebook to a blog post that I LOVED. (in fact, I ended up reading lots of this guy's posts and really liked every one I read, so even though I have no clue who he is, I added him to my google reader and I already plan to use a few things I read in my YW lessons. ("the Tarzan principle" for one...) Here is the link to his blog: http://middle-agedmormonman.blogspot.com/

and here is the text from his today's post - just in case you aren't going to pop over and read it yourself on HIS site...

"There's nothing more exciting in sports than when a team that has been written off pulls together and makes a big push to come from behind and win an important game. Many iconic football and basketball stars have had this knack Guys like Joe Montana, Peyton Manning and John Elway have become legendary - partly from their ability to pull off the 4th Quarter Comeback. How about LeBron James. (Kidding - Just checking to see if sports fans are paying attention.)

Now, I don't want to frighten anyone, but take a look at your calendar. See Saturday? Yes, it is General Conference.

What? You're telling me that they have Conference on Saturday too? Who knew?!

Yes, there has always been Conference on Saturday, and, just to reward the faithful, Saturday sessions are usually better than Sunday sessions. Give it a try.

Where was I...

Oh, this Saturday is not only conference, but it is Q4. The first day of the 4th quarter. Yes, 'tis true - the year is 75% over. We are due for a flurry of holidays, and then 2011 will be gone. Over. Irretrievable. Before you know it, we will find ourselves waking up, laying on our backs, staring at the ceiling saying to ourselves:

"Argh! It is New Years and I didn't get the things done that I had hoped for this year. And now it's time to make the same stupid resolutions again - and most of my new resolutions will be the same stuff that I resolved to fix last year."

Yes, the dreaded New Year's self-assessment. So often it ends in failure.

2011: The year I stopped drinking the ambrosia that is Mt. Dew. (Then started again in June)
2011: The year we struggled with Family Scripture study the most in 15 years.
2011: Can you say "yo-yo dieting"?
2011: The year I did not meet my temple goals.
2011: The year my gym membership worked out to $60 per visit.
2011: The year I did not meet my financial goals.
Etc. (your mileage may vary)

(Just a note: Now is not the time to go all "forget-me-not patient and charitable with myself" - This is leading somewhere)

2011 has not been a particularly "kind" year to many of us. In fact, I know many who have struggled this year. If 2011 were to end this Saturday, I would gladly throw it on the trash heap, dust of my hands, gird up my loins, and start over.

Nope. Not this year. This year I am going to do something different. I am going to stage a late rally. Starting Saturday, I am going to make a 4th Quarter Comeback. You see, this year is not over yet. I have not yet heard the viking-clad woman singing. There is still time to get things done. There is still time to make changes. There is still time to improve.

I want to wake up on New Year's morning, stare at the ceiling, and say "Hah. I kicked 2011's butt." And then go back to sleep. Later in the day, I want to make a whole new set of goals that build on what I accomplished in 2011, instead of the same old stuff.

Yes. I am shifting uncomfortably in my seat as I type this... How am I going to do this? Here is the plan:

1) Between now and Saturday, I'm going to review my year, and what I had hoped to accomplish.
2) This weekend I am going to sit at the feet of the prophets and learn what the Lord wants me to focus on.
3) Discuss these things with my EC and come up with a game plan.
4) Clear it with the Lord.
5) Spend the next 13 weeks - 92 days - getting it done. (I can do most anything for 90 days)
6) Look back at 2011 fondly, as a time where I flexed my soggy self-mastery muscles.

It is time for my 4th Quarter Comeback.

Who's with me?"

It's ME again. Wasn't that great!?!?!? I am totally in. Don't know if I'll do any better as a 4th quarter come back kid than I have in the first 3 quarters of the year, but at least I'll feel better about trying to be a FINISHER! I hate games when my team just seems to have given up. it's like they just accept that they have lost and they don't even bother playing the rest of the game.

YES I CAN - I CAN AND WILL FINISH!!!!!

new look

2011-09-26T10:00:00.000-06:00

for those of you who only read in your "google reader" feed, and don't usually pop over to the actual site (which is what I do unless I am leaving a comment) I decided that I needed a new "fall" look for my blog. in case you are wondering... I am liking it. if I had some "skills" I would tweak a few things - but as it is, I like it and am thankful for the skills of others :)

Now i have to turn off this computer and get to work! it's a new week and I have plenty to do!

Forget-me-nots

2011-09-25T22:24:00.000-06:00

Just like everyone else I know who heard this talk - I LOVED President Uchtdorf's address in the Saturday evening General Relief Society Conference. His words were a balm to my soul and a blessing to my spirit.

He spoke of the Forget-me-not flower, small and easily overlooked, yet one of his favorite flowers and a source of great beauty. He said like the flower has five petals, he had 5 things he wanted us to "forget not."

1 - Forget not to be patient with yourself. So many quotable things throughout this talk, but under this one I loved when he said, "none of you are perfect. And those people that you think are perfect? They're not." He talked of how we compare ourselves with others, typically comparing our weaknesses to their strengths. He spoke of how we can be endlessly loving and compassionate to others, but we fail to extend that same love and compassion to ourselves. That God sees all the SMALL and seemingly insignificant (to us) things we do, and he is pleased.

2 - Forget not that some sacrifices are better than others. While making sacrifices are a part of life, sometimes we make sacrifices for things that are NOT of the greatest value or worth. We need to consider if what we are doing is the best sacrifice for us to make.

3 - Forget not to be happy NOW. He reminded us of the story of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, in which people become so obsessed with finding the "golden ticket" that they lose the ability to enjoy the candy bar. Yes, we should continue to seek for our dreams, but we must enjoy the here and now until that dream is realized. We must look for and find joy in the "little things" everyday.

4 - Forget not the "WHY" of the gospel. (This one a was harder for me to summarize/verbalize, and since one of my other friends already posted this awesome quote, I'm just using it too) "While understanding the “what” and the “how” of the gospel is necessary, the eternal fire and majesty of the gospel springs from the “why.” When we understand why our Heavenly Father has given us this pattern for living, when we remember why we committed to making it a foundational part of our lives, the gospel ceases to become a burden and, instead, becomes a joy and a delight. It becomes precious and sweet.

Let us not walk the path of discipleship with our eyes on the ground, thinking only of the tasks and obligations before us. Let us not walk unaware of the beauty of the glorious earthly and spiritual landscapes that surround us... seek out the majesty, the beauty, and the exhilarating joy of the “why” of the gospel of Jesus Christ."

5 - Forget Not that God loves you and has NOT forgotten you. Pretty self explanatory and POWERFUL. I loved how he declared it - "as an apostle of the Lord Jesus Christ,"...

It was an amazing talk and certainly one that I needed to hear. (and need to LIVE) My thought last night was "I wish I could just carry President Uchtdorf around with me in my pocket and pull him out every time I need a little pep talk." Then I thought, Hey, I guess I kind of can. I can buy the recording of the conference and play it in my car when I need a lift. I can keep a copy of the talk nearby to refer to when I am feeling inadequate or discouraged. And absolutely, I will be planting some FORGET-ME-NOTS.

Truth

2011-09-22T23:01:00.004-06:00

So tonight I was watching TV when I heard the DUMBEST commercial! It made my head snap up and I thought - did they really just say that??? They need a new ad campaign writer, because that was a ridiculous thing to say!

I don't know the company, but the ad was for some luxury car, (I think) and it started out with the announcer saying:

"if no one ever challenged the status quo, the world would still be flat."

Um... NO - it wouldn't! because it never WAS flat!!! Regardless of whether anyone "challenged the status quo" and sailed around the world, it would still BE round.

There is such thing as TRUTH. We live in a world that so often thinks that whatever the general populous "thinks" is correct and real. That is simply not true. There are some things that, regardless of what people think, are eternal truths; and you believing or not believing doesn't change them.

Go ahead, challenge the status quo. When designing cars, inventing new gadgets, finding better ways to teach children, whatever... but remember this - when it comes to eternal truths, all of the challenges in the world aren't going to change what IS.

YW Scripture Challenge

2011-09-19T10:58:00.002-06:00

Two weeks ago I taught the combined young women's lesson. The lesson subject was a great one, all about scripture study and making it more meaningful. I knew that many of our girls have little to no idea of how to use the many resources that we have in our scriptures. Things like the Topical Guide, The Bible Dictionary, and the footnotes. I was frustrated with how the lesson went because I had SO much I wanted to do with them - getting them INTO their scriptures, but when all was said and done, I only got about 20 minutes of lesson time. You know me - - I can barely say HELLO in 20 minutes, let alone teach a lesson!

Oh well, I did my best and sent them all home with a four page worksheet designed to help them USE the resources in the scriptures. It was a worksheet I created by taking and exercise out of my trusty missionary guide. It offers 4 great keys to making scripture study more meaningful, plus exercises to help you practice each skill. In case you are wondering, the four skills are:

1) Identify who or what the passage refers to. (who is speaking, to whom, and about what)
2) Define words and phrases
3) Recognize lists
4) Put your own name into the scriptures

I gave out the handouts and a new spiral bound notebook to use as their scripture journal, and challenged them to 1) complete the handout and 2) read their scriptures DAILY for 2 full weeks, recording in the journals what they read, learned, felt, etc... The promised reward for everyone who completed the challenge is a full size candy bar (or like-priced treat) of their choice. (in addition to the increased testimony and peace that is promised to those who daily read the scriptures)

Of course, being the one who issued the challenge, I HAD to complete it myself. Daily scriptures is a hard things for me, I just find I push it off and push it off, until it is LATE and then I am TOO TIRED, and I do the "I'll do it tomorrow" thing...

I am VERY HAPPY to report that I DID IT!!! Yesterday was day 15, and I did it! Now I'm going for a full 30 days!!!

I know a few girls started the challenge a week late, and others were planning to do it, but I haven't heard yet who has completed it... I know Heather (the 2nd counselor in the YW presidency, and my "partner is crime" for Beehive related stuff) did it! - (Way to go, you awesome woman you!) and we both have really had a positive experience. I am off this week to buy a few candy bars! HOORAY!

they do listen....

2011-09-16T09:06:00.000-06:00

(or.... a Bryan's FHE follow up)

I had a "hey, kids really do sometimes listen during family home evening" moment today.

We had dropped Bryan off at Kindergarten and were out running some errands when out of the blue,
Caleb said to me, "mom, rocks can be bad AND good."

Oh Yeah? (trying not to laugh)

"yep, they are bad if you throw them at people, but you can build walls and good stuff with them too, so they are bad AND good."

nice to know that he heard something, kinda wish it had been the part about "quickly obeying when mom asks you to do something," or the "be reverent during family scripture study" part, or the "don't fight with your brother."

but hey... something is better than nothing, right???

a "boring" lesson... by Bryan

2011-09-12T21:53:00.001-06:00

For Family Home Evening tonight, it was Bryan's turn to teach the lesson. Tim was helping him put something together and was trying to get him to break away from the "pick a picture from the gospel art kit and tell the scripture story" type of lesson that is becoming the all too familiar fall back around here when it is a kids week to teach. (which is 4 out of 6 times in this house).

As they were throwing around ideas - of which Bryan's were pretty random and all over the spectrum, not really connected in any sort of rhyme or reason, and Tim was trying to help him think of a SINGLE topic that our family could actually BENEFIT from, or apply/relate to this week. Tim reminded Bryan that he and I will be going to the temple this week for ward temple night and that the lesson could be about temples.

Imagine in your mind, in the most monotone, boring voice EVER, Bryan's reply:

"Mom and dad are going to the temple this week. THE END. - That would be a boring lesson!"

He's right, that would be a pretty boring lesson. He ended up going with "how to build a stronger family," with some random "stepping stones to get to Jesus," "rocks can be good or bad," ("because you can use them to throw at people which is bad, or you can use them to build walls, which is good, so they are half good half bad.") and having someone read out loud his list of goals from his last father/son interview.

Throw in the other kids with their various attention spans - or lack there-of, their attitudes, some more pleasant than others, and a few dogs who were trying desperately to get us to play fetch and tug of war with the squeaky toy.... and ONE thing I know for certain, FHE at our house is NOT boring!!!

Whew!!! what a week!

2011-09-10T15:29:00.000-06:00

Betcha all thought that I'd just give up on my new facebook goals and just log in regardless of if I blogged or not - right??? NOPE, just been so totally CRAZY around here that I pretty much haven't been online for a few days. It's been an eventful few days -

Brief background: We have a rental property up in West Valley and the tenants moved out unexpectedly. We were lucky to find some new tenants the first week we had the home listed, and they wanted to move in ASAP. Tuesday night, Tim and Brian (our handyman) went out to the property to get an idea of needed repairs. The carpet was really bad and needed to be replaced in addition to other repairs needed. Brian was able to get his team of carpet guys to come in the following day to lay carpet.

So Wednesday morning, around 11'ish I got a call from Tim. We have been thinking about replacing our carpets for a while now, and have talked about it a few times with Brian. The carpet guys told Brian that if we went ahead with the same carpet they were putting into the rental, and did it at the same time, we could get a good deal on it. We decided to jump in head first and agreed to be ready the next day for installers to be here. I spent the remainder of Wednesday clearing everything out of the front room and 3 upstairs bedrooms. Then we painted Bryan & Caleb's room. (it was the WORST in the house. Would have loved to have a few more days to paint the other rooms, but there just wasn't time - I did get the baseboards in the front room done as well.) They arrived on Thursday around 1:30 and I was ready! (I had just barely finished, but was ready)

They ripped out all the old carpet (it was the original carpet that was installed when we built the house in 1998) then while they went to pick up the carpet and take a lunch break, I re-vacuumed all the edges and the carpet pads so it was ready to put the carpet down. They got back around 5 and once they were all settled again, I headed out with the kids to met Tim for dinner. (my kitchen was full of bookshelves, books, computers, tvs, mattresses, etc... and I was WAY too tired to try to actually prepare something. We got home just before 8 to find brand new carpet in four rooms and the stairs! (well, actually, they were still finishing up the stairs and a few places.)

I spent all day Friday moving things back into the rooms. My neighbor and friend Paula came over that morning and helped. It was a good thing, because I was totally spent and wouldn't have been able to get much done on my own. Sometimes it takes having another person there to keep you moving....

I didn't have it in me to totally finish, so I took all that "end stuff" (all those things that don't have a home and you should probably just throw away but you just can't...) and shoved it in a tote. I'm hoping that I'll be able to tackle it next week with a fresh outlook. Spent the day today doing some finishing cleaning, emptying a couple of "catch all baskets" and right now, at THIS MOMENT, the house is pretty good.

The carpets, while maybe not exactly what I would have chose, are nice - and they are perfect for a house full of pets and kids who show no regard for cleanliness.

We took the computer out of our room (wanted more space) so we are experimenting with me using a laptop instead of the desktop. I'm finding it hard to type on this thing, my fingers keep slipping onto the wrong keys, but we'll see how it works out.

I did take some pictures, but I'll just add them to this post (or make a new one) once they are off the camera.

face cards vs face book

2011-09-06T09:44:00.003-06:00

*please note that my left shift key (the one I use most of the time) is broken, (works sporadically at best) and it is not likely that I will be going through to fix all of the lower case letters. please just ignore.

VS.

several weeks ago we were having a "game night" for our young women's activity. I just grabbed a stack of games from our game closet that could have at least 6 players at a time - easy to learn, and quick to play. one of the games i took is called sequence. it is played by drawing a card (basic facecards) and matching the cards to the corresponding picture on the game board. you then place a token of your color on that space and try to get 5 in a row. it's simple, easy to learn, easy to play, and you can play with 3 teams of 2, so i figured it was a good game to take.

we get there, a group of kids pick that table and i proceed to teach them how to play and get them started. then one of our young women came in and pretty much freaked out because we were playing with facecards - which are "forbidden in the church" and are of the devil!

Now, I knew vaguely about the recommendation given many years ago that members of the church shouldn't play with face cards. I mostly know about it only because i remember a story told by my grandfather, about how he remembered his parents throwing their face cards into the wood burning stove when the counsel was given. I wondered if maybe I was leading these poor youth down the paths of sin, so I came home and looked up what i could about it.

the issue regarding the use of playing with face cards seems to have originated from president joseph f. smith. I liked this ensign article,written in 1984 by "Former Stake President, Idaho Falls Idaho Ammon West Stake" in response to the question "How should I feel about playing cards"

"The two most common criticisms of card playing have been, first, that it is a waste of time, and second, that it tends to end in gambling. Both criticisms are valid because, while extremes, they too often occur. Writing at a time before the advent of excessive TV viewing, which is the modern time waster, and before the coming of extensive state-sponsored lotteries, which today enhance the tendency to gamble, some of our General Authorities have spoken out against card playing. Let us consider what President Joseph F. Smith said:

“While a simple game of cards in itself may be harmless, it is a fact that by immoderate repetition it ends in an infatuation for chance schemes, in habits of excess, in waste of precious time, in dulling and stupor of the mind, and in the complete destruction of religious feeling. … There is the grave danger that lurks in persistent card playing, which begets the spirit of gambling, of speculation and that awakens the dangerous desire to get something for nothing.

“One’s character may be determined in some measure by the quality of one’s amusements. Men and women of industrious business-like, and thoughtful habits care little for frivolous pastimes, for pleasures that are sought for their own sake. It is not easy to imagine that leading men in the Church would find any pleasure that was either inspiring or helpful at the card table” (Gospel Doctrine, 5th ed., Salt Lake City: Deseret Book Co., 1939, p. 329).

he concluded his response by saying, "While it is best to avoid the use of “playing cards,” my personal experiences indicate that our family has enjoyed many benefits from playing games with cards. At a time when amusements are generally enjoyed alone, for example TV viewing and video game playing, we in our family like to play card games together. It has been both unifying and has provided the arena for much give and take. All in all, playing card games has given us many delightful moments."

As i thought about this, I determined that the use of facebook, television, other computer distractions, are much more likely than face cards to
1) waste huge chunks of my time
2) open me up to a wide variety of evils,
3) "dull and stupor" my mind,
4) become addictive

etc....

i shared my thoughts regarding this with those (few) girls who seemed interested and/or concerned about the first yw's adamant cries that i had brought SATAN into the church. I told them that they are safer playing a game of sequence for 20 minutes at a youth activity, in cultural hall of the church, then they are spending hours and hours involved in social media, mind numbing and spirit dulling "music," and watching questionable television shows and movies. (I found it hilarious that the girl who started all this chose to stay at that game table (all the while complaining about the evil of it all) since that's where the BOYS that she thinks are cute were sitting. I guess maybe it's ok to be in the presence of Satan if the boys are cute enough?????? NOT!)

I know this is more than long enough already, but i just have to follow up with this - two weekends ago at our stake conference there were several talks that mentioned the over used of facebook, and other other social networking sites. it was prompted that i too am going overboard and am addicted. Elder Oak's talk on good, better, best was quoted a couple of times.

GOOD - facebook allows me to connect with friends and family and know what's going on in their lives

BETTER - blogging is a venue for me to journal - which we are supposed to be doing, and still lets me connect with family and friends (those that are willing to take the time to read more that the 150 characters (or whatever the number is) at a time. (my "blogging" went way down hill once i got a facebook account and now what do I have to show for it? pretty much nothing.)

BEST - writing in my private journal

I'm not so good at writing in my private journal, but i can move it up a step by writing the more "non-personal things" in this forum. My new "facebook rule" is that i cannot log into facebook unless I have

1) worked for at least 1 hour on my "housework"
and
2) written something on my blog with in two days

General Conference, Day 1

2011-04-02T21:57:00.003-06:00

Ok - I'm feeling like a "spiritually out of tune" slacker or something. Typically, the Saturday morning session of conference knocks me off my feet! Today's conference sessions were good, and I learned things I needed to hear, but nothing that fit into the "balm of Gilead" category for my soul - as in recent years past. Might have had something to do with the fact that I have had most/all of the kids in the same room as me, and was helping them with their conference packets, etc... Or maybe it could also have to do with the fact that I have had some great spiritual experiences in the past couple months, so maybe I wasn't so desperately in need this time round? who knows? (Could also very likely have been that I was SUPER tired and was fighting hard to stay awake! - not really conducive to divine inspiration...)

I did take notes,

From Elder Perry I was taught that I need to do better myself and in teaching my children to observe the Sabbath and keep it holy.

Sister Steven's talk just made me grateful I had so many great years with the children of the 10th ward

Elder Gonzalez reminded me how to be a "true follower of Christ."

Elder Richard's talk was about the purpose of pain and trials in our lives, and how the Atonement is the source to overcome pain, both physical, spiritual, emotional, mental, etc...

Elder Cook gave a great talk about power of a righteous woman and how the women in the church are incredible! It was inspiring to recognize the power and influence that woman can have and a good reminder that I need to be better at wielding that power in righteous ways.

Elder Eyring spoke of caring for the poor and the needy. I figure I'll be pulling out this talk when the YW want to plan service activities :)

My favorite part of President Packer's talk was his story about "John, leave it alone." Taking offense is a surefire way to hurt yourself -

My favorite two lines from Elder Nelson were "our faith NOW becomes part of our posterity's faith LATER." and that we cannot take the "cafeteria approach to obedience."

I had some bountiful basket issues that had to be resolved in during the next two talks, so I missed both names, and I missed most of the 2nd talk...but the topics of the first talk was the doctrine of Eternal families. He warned of three of Satan's big tools to destroy families. Selfishness, Greed, and Pornography. I am certainly guilty of selfishness far to often and need to work on that as well. He also reassured that weekly FHE, daily prayer and scripture, difficult though it is, WILL fortify the family.

Elder Oaks gave a great talk on the power of our DESIRES. We must lose desire to sin (this is a choice we make) and must "readjust our desires" to put eternal things first.

Finally, Elder Ballard spoke on the essential principle of CHARITY, the pure love of Christ.
#1 - charity begins at home,
#2 - Charity in our wards ("there is no place for gossip" - jumped out at me, another upcoming lesson in YW's I'm sure;)
#3 - charity in our communities.

It was a good conference. I was REALLY REALLY tired, having gotten to bed after midnight, then woken up at least twice that I remember by Caleb, and then up at 5:30 for BB. I guess I'm lucky that I got as much out of it as I did.

While Tim was at Priesthood session, I met with one of my sweet Beehive girls and did my first personal Progress... uh, would it be called an interview??? Whatever you call it, it was good. I love to see the faith and hope of these beautiful young ladies. T. is a GREAT young lady and I look forward to getting to know her better and watching her grow.

all in all, a good day

Honor and Beasts

2011-04-02T17:34:00.000-06:00

GREAT news on the academic front -

For the first time EVER, Aaron made the honor roll. (2 B's, the rest A's.) We are super proud of him. He set the goal and worked hard. (plus a little extra prodding and encouragement from parents, but HE DID IT!)

Another great piece of news with Aaron is that he FINALLY found a book (series) that he likes! He has started reading the Beast Quest Series by Adam Blade. In the past 3 (maybe 4) weeks he has read 10 books!!!!! You have NO idea how WONDERFUL this is to me. Up to this point, I would be hard pressed to think of ONE book that he read, cover to cover, on his own. Granted, these books are pretty short (under 100 pages) and simple, but that is beside the point. The point is - that he found something that interests him and that he WANTS to read. I am praying that this will serve as a springboard to launch him into other books, but regardless of where we go from here - he found a book, read a book, comprehended the storyline of a book, and wanted MORE...

HALLELUJAH!!!!!

a quick funny...

2011-04-01T09:42:00.000-06:00

I have so much to do today, I shouldn't be on here at all, but since i am trying to play blog catch up, I'll just share a quick FUNNY Katrina moment.

It was about a week or so ago, and I don't recall what evactly she was talking about, but Katrina was talking to Tim and said something like

"I haven't be able to do (whatever it was) for 500 hundred million days."

Tim - "you haven't even been alive for that many days."

Katrina - "I know dad, I was just abbreviating."

a painful goodbye

2011-03-27T23:36:00.001-06:00

Today I was released from my calling as Primary Chorister. I have served in that capacity for a long time, over 5 years. It is amazing to me to think that the kids in Junior primary have NEVER had anyone but me. (except for the very few times I've gotten a sub) The kids in Senior primary... they don't remember anyone but me. My kids, all but Aaron, have never had any music leader but me. Aaron was only 5 when I started in that calling. IN other words, I AM primary music to those kids.

And I LOVE them!

When Bro. Farr called me in last Wednesday and told me they were releasing me from Primary, I couldn't help myself, I started to cry. I couldn't speak, just nodded my head when he gave me my new calling (another post to follow). He then said they wanted me to still do the music for Sunday to give the new person another week to "catch her breath." That was one of THE hardest things I've ever had to do!

My kids saw me crying when I got home that night and they knew where I had gone... Katrina sobbed herself to sleep that night, she literally cried for over an hour... broke my heart even more. Aaron stated that he was "never going to church ever again!" and that he was going to get all of the senior primary kids together and convince them to raise their hands when the bishopric member asked if there was anyone "opposed." I talked to him quite a bit about it all, and SOME of it sunk in. He didn't rally anyone else to join his rebellion - but when the "opposed" question was asked, his hand shot up, straight and sure!

Trying to look at the kids and sing with them was nearly impossible. How much I am going to miss those little monkeys. They were so much FUN to be with. I loved their off the wall comments and random thoughts. I love their enthusiasm and energy. I love their simple and sincere testimonies and desire to learn and do what is right. and that was just junior primary.

Saying good-bye to the senior primary about ripped my heart out! I know that every calling has to come to an end at some time, but it's like I told Tim (when he was mocking me for crying so long and hard about it) ... In order to really magnify your calling, you have LOVE those you are called to serve. That same love that helps you serve well, means that when it comes time to move onto a new learning adventure, your heart gets broken.

I LOVE MY primary kids, all of them. (the 110 children currently in primary, plus all of the ones who have moved up into YM and YW and moved away over the past 5 + years.) I cherish the time I have spent with them, learning and singing testimony building songs. I pray that they will remember the many messages and testimonies I have shared with them, and that during times of heartache or trial, the words and messages of the songs we sang together will comfort and lift them.

I am taking the liberty of copying the facebook thread about this tough day and I'm pasting them here so that I will have them in my journal. You DO NOT need to read these - they are totally just "stroke my ego" kind of comments... I worked really hard for many years in that calling, and hearing that I did well and that I will be missed validates me.

my original facebook post:

Tough day. I have a headache from crying so much. After 5+ years of being the primary chorister, I was released today. It was hard. I love those children SO SO much!!! and I love the power of the primary songs in helping build their growing testimonies.
Looking forward (with mild trepidation) to the next adventure... Beehive Advise...r/ Camp Director. Ready, Set, GO!

responses:

Jeri M ‎(the mean trick they pulled was releasing me...but still having me do the calling for one more week... talk about TOUGH! trying to sing while my heart was breaking, the tears were falling, and my voice kept cracking... not fun!) Nicol - you will do a great job!
Kristina W Jeri, I miss sitting in the back learning the songs from you. You are the epitomy of what I try to be when I sub as primary chorister. God bless you in YW!
Kelly W Holy cow, I never thought it would happen. You were fabulous as a chorister and you'll be fabulous as advisor/director.

Allison J You will be a wonderful Advisor/Director. I guess those girls need to hear your wisdom, Jeri!!
Corinne Congratulations/condolences....as necessary. ;-) You'll do a great job, as always. (((HUGS)))
Charlotte Aww Jeri! That's rough, rough, rough! You'll be GREAT in YW, and I know you'll love those girls within a week or two, but I feel your pain at leaving Primary behind.
Jeri M - Charlotte - I already love most of them. all but 4 of the YW I had as Primary kids... (those 4 moved into the ward already YW...) The Laurels in there right now??? It was my first year in primary when when we sang them their "goodbye songs..." and passed them on to YW's. how times flies!
Nicol B - Jeri, you are going to be wonderful, of this I have no doubt. But I swear if they call me to be the camp director after you it will probably be the first time I ever turn down a calling. "I'm sorry, Bishop, but Jeri is just too good to follow twice!!"
Sarah B I'll admit I was mildly jelous when they called you! You will be SO good for those girls! Camp is going to be AMAZING!!!!
Tanya D You will have such a blast at camp. The planning is fun and watching the girls on the last night is awe inspiring. I loved every minute of that calling. You will be so awesome. Hands down.
Theresa M Hey! Now we can compare notes! You'll love it, but I understand how hard it is to leave something you love doing. :-)
Harmony P Some changes aren't easy, but I have a feeling you're going to rock this next adventure too. Lucky YW!
Michelle C You'll do great. You always so good with the youth.
Julie L B Wow, we would have loved you as chorister in our ward, especially because I've just been called as pianist. . . wouldn't that have been a good time? You're going to be awesome at camp, I know you'll love it and the girls will love you!
Katie B Jeri, So sorry that you have to move on from the calling that you love so much. It will also be hard for everyone in primary to lose such a devoted chorister. I'm sure the first few weeks will be rough, but then you will find yourself starting to lose the YW as much as the Primary Children. You'll definitely have a great adventure at camp! If we were there, you would be with my little beehive, Jessica. XOOO
Katie B PS- Don't forget to bring some music into YW with you. Maybe not too many primary songs, but you can start listening to the YW & EFY music.
Jennifer S The kids will miss you. Sadie was sobbing when i picked her up from Primary and couldn't stop until we were half way to Farmington. You did a great job and you will be missed! The young women are then lucky ones now! Hooray!
Jake F I agree. Your calling was indeed inspired if I do say so myself! :)
Jeri M ya - it was a pretty AWESOME bishop that made that particular calling...
Anna K Changing church callings can be so hard!! Good luck with your new calling. I can't think of a better person to be working with those girls!
Laura L Good Luck on your new calling, Im sure the kids will miss ya too :)
Kathy M There's an opening up here! Actually several callings are currently available! We would love to have you EVERYWHERE! You will love those girls..I'm still in contact with mine and went to the Temple with most of them.
Damon B You will do great in whatever calling you are given because you will give it your all. Oh and yes we have a multitude of callings available here if you want to come.
Lisa T WHAT!!??!! How did I miss this news? (I guess you miss out on a lot of things when you and your newborn are at home hiding out from all the germs). Jeri, you have been A-M-A-Z-I-N-G in your calling!! And will be in your next also! But those kids will sure miss you!
also got this email from another mom:
Dear Jerri-
I went in to Emma's room last night after I had tucked her in and I found her crying. I asked her what was wrong and through her little tears she told me that she was just so sad that you weren't going to be in Primary anymore. I wanted to thank you for the impact you have had on her. She has literally grown up with you, and I am so thankful for the opportunity she has had to be influenced by you. Admittedly I was jealous that I never got to serve in the Primary while you were there. The few times I subbed I was so impressed with the spirit you brought to your teaching. Not only did you teach the children the music but you taught them how to apply them to their lives- and they got it! Amazing! How blessed we have all been by your service. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you!

Amy

10 virgins presentation

2011-03-24T22:57:00.000-06:00

For Christmas Tim gave me a copy of the musical presentation of the 10 virgins. My next door neighbor Christie is the Relief Society President of our ward and one afternoon when she was over I said something along the lines of "if you want to borrow this to look it over, the Relief Society might want to use it for a RS activity.") I thought I might get asked to participate in such a production, but felt relatively safe, since I am in the PRIMARY...

Christie returned my booklet and music about a week later and said, Bishop approved it, the enrichment committee thinks it sounds great, will you be in charge of putting it together for our March RS birthday activity?" (not quite what I had in mind, but many people have told me, "duh, what did you expect?")

It was an interesting experience. I should let you know upfront that I am NOT a "director." I have no "drama" experience. I had absolutely NO clue what I was doing. That being said, it went pretty well.

I truly felt that things were guided by a power greater than myself. From the very beginning, in selecting which sister would play which roles, all the way along. I thought it was inspiring how so many times during the process, I would have an idea of how I was going to do something, then as I was attempting to implement the ideas, it wouldn't go well. I would persevere, not knowing what else to do, until suddenly (usually at night as I was dropping off to sleep) an idea would pop into my mind, clear as could be. And that new idea worked every time.

Each Sunday, for the 7 or 8 weeks leading up to the event, I went into RS to make the announcement. I took about 5 minutes each week to introduce one of the characters. I shared a bit about her strengths and her challenges. I shared a bit about the song she sings, and the messages that I personally learned from each song. Then I issued a "10 virgins challenge" for the week. For example, right after stake conference I talked about the character Nava, who's song sings "I try so hard to remember, but it's so easy to forget." and I reminded the sisters how powerful our Stake Conference had been and how easy it is to forget that power and just slip back into our "regular lives." The challenge for the week was to fight that tendency to slip back into the routine and to fight to REMEMBER and not forget the promptings we had received during the conference. Doing this helped the sisters to be excited about the activity, and to begin to prepare their hearts and minds for the messages they would hear.

Practices were a challenge. Consider the fact that we were trying to arrange the schedules of 10 busy women; mothers, students, wives, etc (some of them all 3 of those aforementioned roles)... plus 2 young women, plus the ward building availability... It was an adventure... We actually only had one practice (well, 1 hour of one practice to be exact) with everyone there - at our dress rehearsal. At that same dress rehearsal, we still had several of the participants who didn't know their parts, and 2 sisters for whom it was their FIRST practice at all... in other words it was a really stressful practice for me! (The dress rehearsal also happened to fall on the same day as my little brother Eric's wedding - so it was an ultra crazy day for me! Eric's wedding the weekend before was a HUGE blessing though, because I just hi-jacked the wedding cake from the reception and used it as props for our presentation. It worked GREAT!)

The night of the actual dinner and presentation, the turn out was great! They ended up having to set out 2 more tables as more people kept coming, and they were a little short on food. The big panic moment for me came when one of the YW was LATE! I knew she had a soccer game and she told me she'd be there by 6:30. We were slated to start the presentation at 7. 7PM rolls around and Jenny wasn't there yet. I was just a smidgen panicked! At 7 I just started to put on a costume and figured I could do her part until she got there, then she could slip into her spot. Not the best idea, but certainly better than me trying to sing her song! Luckily for me, she ran in before I had to do that!

The sisters did an amazing job. The spirit was there in abundance and hearts were touched. I'm not saying that I'd like to do it all again... but I will say that it was a great opportunity for me and I was thankful for how much I learned personally from the experience.

I feel badly that I never thought to take picture of each sister with her props, and I sent out my camera with someone else to take pictures of the set and everything, but the camera wasn't on the right setting, so all of those pictures were blurry. I did get a few pictures though, and here they are.


some of the lamps... I meant to take a picture of all 12, but of course I forget...

Jenny S., Jessica G., Kristen D., Rebecca M., Paula S., Jenny N., Allison B., Evelyn E., Tenille F., Aubrey B., Brooke P., and Emily G. 12 AMAZING sisters!!!

not a great shot, but the basic set up. the cake is back in that closet with the open doors. It worked perfectly, so the 5 wise virgins could go into the wedding feast and "the great wooden doors were shut."

the cake, with the 2 narrator chairs on either side.

Eric's Reception and Wedding

2011-03-19T18:31:00.001-06:00

I remember being a jr in High school, my "little" brother Eric was born. He has been the baby of the family for so long, that it hard for me to think of him as being old enough to be married. be that as it may, Eric is now married. While on his mission to Australia (Korean speaking) he met Jin Sook. He helped to re-activate her, and then was a stellar member missionary who fellow-shipped many of the people Eric helped to teach. A while after Eric was home, She and some other Korean friends came to America for a visit. One thing led to another - and the next thing I heard was that he was engaged. It took a while for all of her Visa stuff to go through, but FINALLY she got the go ahead and the wedding was set.

They had their reception on Friday the 18th and then were sealed in the Mt Timpanogos temple on Saturday morning. Here are a few pictures from the two joyful events.

the cousins admiring the cake

the cultural hall - transformed...


a picture of the cake - is my mom amazing or what??? (she made it)

the wedding party. (since Jin Sook's parents couldn't make it over, my mom made life size cut outs so they could (sort of) be there... They did have a "pre-wedding" reception in Korea when Eric flew over to meet the family and all that jazz, several months ago.

cutting the cake (although they didn't really cut it - they saved it for me to use the following week, which will come up in another update post)

aren't they cute?

Here's Tim and my dad hauling the cake out to my van after the reception

AND NOW... Saturday, March 19th

happy couple exiting the temple

Eric, Jin Sook, and my parents - (they left the cut out home, no recommends for foam board, go figure)

the family - with Mark on the phone with Subway, ordering our "wedding luncheon" We really missed having Laura & Damon and Matt & Tammy. Someday we'll get the whole family again!

Welcome to family Jin Sook!! Congrats to Eric on selecting a beautiful and sweet bride, and great job on putting together a beautiful reception Mom!

PS - as with any typical family event, Yes, there was "DRAMA," but in the interest of only speaking well of others and not dwelling on minor offenses, I am choosing to not mention any of those silly things... because in the end, all that really matters is that everlasting covenants were made, and a new eternal family unit was formed.

time to play catch-up... again

2011-03-18T16:38:00.003-06:00

I pulled out my "blog book" today and had a blast reading the almost 2 years of posts printed in there. THAT is why I have a blog. I need to get back to that. The past several weeks have been crazy insane busy, and I'm trying to figure out the best way to get semi-caught up. I think I'll just post them in random order, depending on what I feel like writing about on any given day, but I will DATE them correctly, so they will be in Chronological order so that when I print out my next blog book, then events will be in the correct order. (thus, even though this post is being written on 3/31 - I am going to date it march 18th)

the PUSH Challenge - day 2

2011-03-02T10:43:00.000-07:00

yesterday's assignment was to just start thinking about my life VALUES.

Day 2 - my assignment today was to work out ON PAPER my top 3 priorities and to break them down into more specific items.

I struggled with this assignment just a little, because in my MIND I know what I want my priorities to be, but my ACTIONS are often not consistent with those priorities. I suppose that I am supposed to write down what I WANT my priorities and actions to be? With that as my base assumption – my top 3 priorities are:

#1 – HOME (to be cheerfully and positively engaged with my husband & kids -and create a loving home environment.)

#2 – GOD (daily strengthen my personal spirituality)

#3 – Others (reach out to others in need, give help spiritually, mentally, emotionally, physically, etc...)

Looking at those, I recognize that I "should" switch number 1 and 2/ God is supposed to come first - then everything else after that. guess I'll have to ponder that some more and see how the challenge helps me redefine things.

OK - I pondered. I am going to switch them because I believe it is the right thing to do. My top 3 priorities are:

#1 - GOD

#2 - HOME

#3 - OTHERS

The next part of the assignment was to answer some questions about why I placed the #1 priority where I did and what actions are (and are not) consistent with that #1 status. Then to identify what things need to change to honor that priority.

The final step was to create a"top priority clarity statement."

My number one priority is to strengthen my personal relationship with God. The first of the 10 commandments was "Thou shalt have no other God's before me." In the New Testament, Jesus taught, "Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment." When I have a close, personal relationship with God, He can then guide me in all other aspects of my life. I will have peace in all that I do. I build and strengthen my relationship with him through regular prayer, scripture study, meditation, and temple attendance.

I am READY to change MY life!

2011-02-28T12:44:00.001-07:00

last week, one of my bloggy friends posted about a free course she had just participated in, and she is going to repeat the course in March. It sounded like it was really helpful for her in helping identify and prioritize her priorities. She was able to identify and streamline some of her life goals, and more importantly, she was able to make PROGRESS in many areas. Pop on Over to Karlene's site if you want to read about her success last month.

Since her first post, she has decided - in true Karlene style - to make it a PARTY!. I had already signed up to participate before she even announced the party, and now I am inviting YOU to join in - if you want... no pressure here, you are welcome to just cheer me on instead!

Here's some basic info from Karlene's blog:

What: Chalene Johnson's 30 Day Challenge to Master Organization and Achieve Your Goals

When: March 1st

Where: Online; daily e-mails with links to short videos.

Cost: FREE

I'll be honest - I'm a bit nervous. I think that is because I really do want to make some pretty significant changes in my life, but I just keep FIZZLING out, and I am afraid of trying something and feeling like I've failed AGAIN! But as they say, if you fall, ya just gotta get back on the horse and keep trying.

So - if you happen to read this today, and you want to play with us - sign up NOW cause it starts tomorrow and I think you have to be signed up by the 1st to do it in March. and if you want to join the Karlene party - go to her site and follow her directions.

Wish me LUCK!

hi ho, hi ho

2011-02-25T10:30:00.004-07:00

it's back to the calorie count I go...

SO a while ago, maybe last summer'ish, I decided it was time to get more serious about losing this extra 30 -35 lbs I've been carrying around. I topped out at around 174. but the trend was slowing creeping up and up, and I knew I needed to do something before it got any higher.

I had success right way and dropped 5-7 lbs. then it got harder. I wasn't on any specific "diet," since my observations have shown me that "diets" don't work long term because you aren't changing the lifestyles, habits, and mental/emotional processes that are the real problem. I continued to try to eat more healthy foods and eat less junky snacks. I finally made it down to the 160 range. lowest weight in at 157, but I usually bounce up and down between 159 and 163. I figure that with those numbers in mind, I feel comfortable saying I've lost 10 lbs. While that is good, and it is progress, I have been at this plateau for too long and I need to see success and progress again...

Tim introduced me to a free online program that helps you count calories. I happen to really HATE counting calories, but it really does help to see exactly what I'm shoveling into my mouth and how those food choices add up calorie wise. I tracked really well for a couple weeks, then fizzled out. Today I have recommitted myself to start tracking and counting again. If nothing else, it makes me think twice before I eat snacks, cause I know I have to go in and track it.

I have been reading the story of one gal's weigh loss journey on a blog that I love to read and often find very inspiring. Amber's story of taking back control of her weight and life is inspirational. I CAN do this... I just need to BE committed and STAY committed to the little steps.

I think an essential part of being able to accomplish this goal of mine is that I need to know WHY it is a goal. Why is this important to me, or is it really that important???

With that in mind, here are my reasons:

** My family has a history of diabetes. My oldest bro got diabetes when he was 7 years old. my next bro got it in his late 20's. my mom and dad both got in the last couple of years. My grandma had diabetes. My sister had gestational diabetes with one of her pregnancies. I figure I am a ticking time bomb and that it isn't a matter of IF I'll get it, but WHEN. Every day that I stay over my "ideal body weight" or "healthy BMI" or whatever scale you want to look at, I shorten the time I have before that time bomb explodes and I find myself dealing with daily diabetes issues.

** I want to set good example for my children. I want them to be healthy and to have healthy body images. I already hear my kids saying negative things about their "fat bodies" and I am fairly confident they got that from me! I want them to know that it is important to follow the Word of Wisdom and to take care of your body, but that it is not about being "SKINNY," it is about being HEALTHY and fit.

** I want to like what I see in the mirror. I have always struggled with low self esteem and poor body image. (having a couple "boys" that I "loved" and thought I would marry, tell me that I wasn't "pretty enough" didn't really help.) I know that losing weight isn't going to be the "cure" for this. There are lots of skinny-minnies out there who don't like what they see in the mirror, but I love what Dr. Laura says about self-esteem. She says that you gain self-esteem by DOING things that are worthy of that esteem. (my words, not hers) That if you want to feel good about yourself, you have to DO things that will help you gain that self respect. You have to set worthy goals and then accomplish them. I want to look good in my clothes again. Heck - I want to FIT into my size 12 pants again!!! (the size 10's seem TOO far out of reach right now)

** I do believe that our bodies are a gift from God and that we are charged with taking good care of them. While I do not have any trouble with the "thous shalt nots" of the Word of Wisdom, I cannot honestly say that I live the law, when I abuse my body by taking garbage into it and consistently overindulging, including eating too much of the "good" foods. There are many blessings promised to those who live this law. I want to start reaping those blessings.

** At my last physical, my cholesterol levels came back too high. I told them that I didn't want to go on medication. I wanted 6 months to try to lower the levels myself first. Apparently, high cholesterol runs through my family too... fun for me! (I'm hoping that my levels were high because my tests were done at the end of December, and I made and ATE SO MUCH toffee and peanut brittle that month. We are talking pretty much STRAIGHT BUTTER! (yummy though) SO I'm hoping that skewed my numbers a bit :)

I think that is about it. I know that this has to be a gradual, daily, lifestyle, change, or it won't last. The reasons are life-long reasons. (as opposed to something like "I want to be skinny for my 20 year HS reunion" or "I want to be skinny for my trip to Hawaii" - I tried both of those and they didn't work.

I want to be HEALTHY for the rest of my life so that I FEEL good, LOOK good, and can DO good.

one room...

2011-02-21T16:09:00.002-07:00

I spent much of the morning in Katrina's room, helping her rearrange some of the furniture and cleaning everything. It looks so nice in there. So open and uncluttered. I find that I keep wandering away from what I am supposed to be doing back in there - just to sit in the ONLY clean room in the house. It's just nice and peaceful.

This is my kitchen when it is picked up and clean. (at least it is clean by my (fairly low) standards) This is how I LIKE it and how I WANT it to be!

I finally took a picture one day after I got the kitchen clean - so I would have evidence that it DID get done!

I remember all too clearly, one particular day, a few months ago, when I worked my tail off ALL DAY long. When I went to bed (exhausted) that night, EVERY ROOM in the house was picked up, vacuumed or mopped, toilets clean, windows washed, etc... The whole house, all at one time - WAS CLEAN! I was THRILLED!

The very next day???????????

here's the kitchen - in all it's messiness

the front room: complete with jackets, broom, mop, vacuum, cushions off chair, and some kind of leaf concoction all over the floor...


entry way/stairs - kids backpacks, 1/2 eaten apple, balloon, poster board from school project...

main bath... a book, shoes, a coat, sink full of water with rocks soaking in it, water all over counter and floor, hairbrush, towel on sink...

Trina's room - MESS


Kitchen floor - mess

I have more pictures, one of every room in the house, in fact. EVERY ROOM (literally) in the house had stuff on the floor. I was so so SO frustrated. I took pictures to prove that is isn't just that I NEVER EVER clean... it's the fact that no matter how much good I accomplish - my four darling children - whom I love dearly (sometimes I just don't like them very much) can UNDO it WAY faster than I can EVER keep up!

OK - thanks for listening to me gripe. I think I'll go back into Katrina's room to get myself centered again, then pick another room to tackle before it's time to make dinner. Maybe tonight I can go to bed with TWO clean rooms!

P.S. (added at bedtime.) Katrina's room is still clean (with a small effort after 2 of her friends came over to play this afternoon, one of whom is the dress up queen), front room and stairs are done, and kitchen is about 98% done. Not too shabby for as hopeless as I was feeling

so cute...

2011-02-16T20:18:00.001-07:00

Katrina got a note from the boy that sits next to her in class. I thought it was so cute I just had to record it. Here it is, with all spelling and punctuation (or lack thereof) "in tact"

"Deer Katrina I like you be koss your fonee and be koss your smart"

Also in the same stack of papers, I found a "valentine" that Katrina had made for Aaron (as in her big brother Aaron) This was in response to last Friday when Katrina and Aaron cooked up the idea that he would come down to her class and be her show and tell.

"Dear Aaron thank you so much for being my show and tell. I rilly apreshat it."

It's nice to see physical evidence that they do love each other, since sometimes they don't act like it... Actually, they aren't that bad. Most of the time the get along pretty well and enjoy playing together. just for fun, here's a small collection of pictures (spanning 6 years) of Katrina and her awesome "big brother."

I hope they always choose to show love to each other. They are very different from each other in so many ways, and I love them both very much!

I always called it the "FIZZLE FACTOR"

2011-01-17T10:18:00.001-07:00

** This was an article in the Deseret News that I really liked. It was nice to see it written out SO CLEARLY why it is so stinkin' hard to reach the lofty goals I set. The goals are good, the emotion and commitment are strong, then the emotion fades and the status quo takes over once again. I am hoping that by giving full credit to the author and the source that I am not guilty of some copyright or plagiarism laws....

Setting goals and the shelf life of emotion

By Timothy R. Clark, For the Deseret News
Published: Monday, Jan. 17, 2011

Two weeks ago you could walk into any health club and greet the same scene: An hour wait for a spin bike. Pilates classes spilling into the halls. Smiles, sweat and heavy breathing. From gym to gym, it was the same story. Simply electric.

Two weeks later: Rows of idle ellipticals, racks of stoic weights. And listen. What do you hear? The decibel reading has plummeted from 85 to 42. Give it one more month and the annual burst followed by the desolate aftermath will be complete. A lot of things change over time, but the basic pattern of human behavior remains the same.
In most cases, a goal — in this case a New Year’s resolution — is an act of violence against the status quo. It pits you against yourself. Self 1 wants to experience the exhilaration and rewards of pushing to your outer limits. Self 2 is firmly ensconced in the routines, stability and equilibrium of life. Self 1 wants to disturb. Self 2 wants to preserve
Self 1 feels the excitement, promise and anticipation of a new year. There is an air of expectancy. Self 2 is resistant and content. But in the first days of the new year, Self 1 overpowers Self 2 with a sense of urgency and renewed hope.
Most New Year’s resolutions are goals to achieve meaningful behavioral change. For example, exercise more, eat less, get out of debt, stop smoking, demonstrate more patience, become a better leader, and the like. These things are more than tweaks or tinkering at the margins.
Effecting behavioral change is astonishingly difficult. It pegs out at a 10 on a 10-point scale. If you have doubts, consider the avalanche of confirming data. Success is a deviant case. Studies show achievement rates in the 10 percent to 20 percent range, so there’s a high chance you will wake up one day before January has expired and realize that your resolutions have passed into history in the form of noble intent.
The pattern is one of early failure. We tend to flame out quickly because we rely on the shelf-life of emotion. Emotion is a great catalyst for change, but it’s more like a booster rocket. It gets you off the landing pad, but it won’t sustain the journey.

Most people go slack after just a few days. Inertia stages a coup and re-hoists the flag of the status quo, quashing the effort. We slump into intractable and rebellious complacency. We accept defeat quickly, run a soothing script in our minds, and resume normal patterns of behavior. And for all of this we have several perfectly logical explanations at the ready. Furthermore, it doesn’t help that our mainstream culture is in a mad rush for on-demand thrills, sensations, and instant gratification. So a long, hard slog to change behavior can be an exquisitely difficult journey.

Thomas Edison said he failed his way to success. Teddy Roosevelt said his life was checkered with failure. Success is not the absence of failure. It’s the rejection of a life of ease, which also happens to guarantee some failure. It’s a willingness to travel to your outer limits.
Go at it again, but this time put up some scaffolding for support. I often use what I call the “8 Here-to-There Questions” to help leaders and organizations prepare for goal achievement.
1. Do I know what the goal is?
2. Do I know how to achieve the goal?
3. Do I have the resources to achieve the goal?
4. Do I have the skills to achieve the goal?
5. Can I measure the goal?
6. Am I accountable for the goal?
7. When will I achieve the goal?
8. How will I replenish energy along the way?
If you have good answers to all eight questions, you have a solid chance of sustaining your efforts far beyond the shelf-life of emotion. Remember, the uncelebrated little things lead to the celebrated big things. Finally, listen to Self 1. Tell Self 2 to hit the gym.

Timothy R. Clark, Ph.D., is an author, international management consultant, former two-time CEO, Fulbright Scholar at Oxford University and Academic all-American football player at BYU. His latest two books are "The Leadership Test" and "Epic Change." E-mail: trclark@trclarkpartners

primary at home

2011-01-16T15:45:00.003-07:00

Apparently there is a problem with one of the sensors in the church alarm system. It went off twice last week during church (I was home sick and missed out on the fun), and had gone off twice already today before we started our sacrament meeting at 1:00. The facility management personnel told our bishopric that if it went off again they should just cancel the remainder of church and send everyone home.

About 15 minutes into the meeting, right after the first sacrament prayer was said and they boys had begun passing the bread, the alarm went off. Under the direction of the bishopric, they continued to pass - through the ensuing alarms and continual emergency announcements. It was certainly a first for me.

I found it really interesting that once I got over the initial distraction of the alarm (and the giggles and noise of children (of all ages) going on around me), I actually felt the spirit MORE than I have, while taking the sacrament, for a long time. I think it is because it really drove home to me the importance and sacredness of that ordinance. Partaking of the symbols of Christ's Atonement are SO important, that we continued on through the chaos that surrounded us. (and don't worry, they sent someone out to check all the rooms to make sure there really wasn't a fire this time...) I was reminded that the spirit can be felt in all circumstances, if our hearts are open. That sometimes it takes something out of the ordinary occurring to help us appreciate the simple, "routine" things, that we take so for granted.

When the alarm went off, Aaron was just a tad bit too excited about the prospect of NO MORE CHURCH - and NO PRIMARY, so I announced that we would be holding primary at home. We prayed together, sang songs, repeated the theme, and read scriptures. Our Primary President came down to our home and presented her sharing time lesson for us. LUCKY US! (this came about because Luke, her son, is Aaron's best friend and he wanted to invited Luke to come to "our primary." - Aaron seemed pretty excited to be able to invite his friends to come (Luke and Chris), but realistically I have to admit that it just might have something to do with the whole "misery loves company" thing.) Any which way you choose to look at it, when we invited Luke to come, Sister W. said she would come down and do sharing time for us. It was great. The lesson was on holding to the iron rod (symbolic of the word of God) to guide us through the trials of life.

For singing time we played pictionary - each child got to draw pictures until we guessed the name of a song (of their choosing), then we sang that song. It was fun. I took the opportunity to teach them that if there ever came a time that for whatever reason, we couldn't attend regular church meetings, we could still have the lessons, sharing time, and singing time, in our home - and I pointed out to them the things I had be taught today about how important the sacrament is. It was a good meeting, I felt the spirit and I hope the kids did too. PLUS they still got out a whole hour early!

Thank you Laura for your sharing time - it was great!

there were five in the bed....

2011-01-09T20:31:00.002-07:00

and the biggest one said - -

I'M SICK!

That has pretty much been the scene at our house this week. My bed has been filled all week with sick little bodies, including my own. I haven't been this sick for a LONG LONG time. (knock on wood)

(I wanted to have Tim take a picture of all 5 of us lying in bed like a bunch of sick-heads so I could post it here on my blog, but to tell you the truth, it was just too much effort to ask him to do it. (Yes, I was THAT bad) Maybe we'll do an re-enactment so I have a photo)

I feel pretty silly admitting this, but for a while now, any time I start feeling the tiniest bit sick, I start popping my immune boosting vitamins (A,C, & E) - and I typically cut off the illness at the pass and just keep plugging along without too much trouble. This time, however, I was a bit cocky and thought, "oh no, I'll be FINE."

WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!

Don't know for sure what exactly I had - but I would guess the flu. I had the coughing, stuffed sinuses, fevers, aches and pains, and totally weak. Tuesday was the worst day, and I've been gradually (very very gradually) getting a smidgen stronger every day.

Today I stayed home from church, not because I was SO SO sick that I couldn't go, but because there was NO WAY I'd have the energy level required to fulfill my calling. Plus Caleb has a goopy nose and I'm pretty sure that the other Sunbeam mom's would prefer that I keep him home.

I have repented of my cockiness and started taking my ACE vitamins a couple days ago (coincidence or not, my recovery started to be marked and noticeable by the 2nd day) I expect that this week will require a bit slower pace, but I am glad I am on the uphill side of this particular battle.

Happy New Year

2011-01-01T15:25:00.001-07:00

As you can tell - I fell off the blogging bandwagon again - and it is becoming rather obvious to me that my blogging "roller coaster" follows rather closely to my "emotional roller coaster." (obviously I've spent the last month or so on a mostly downhill portion of the track...)

I typically LOVE Christmas, but I had a really hard time getting into the right spirit this year. I'm working on a few things, and planning to get back in to see Nathalie (energy healer) ASAP! I am hopeful and confident that life will be back to it's regular ups and downs (as opposed to mostly downs) soon!

As I said, I am trying to do my part. I've been listening to a Wayne Dyer seminar that I am finding very interesting - and I'm looking forward to trying out his "manifesting" mediation technique. If all goes well, I'll be sharing some of the principles and affirmations here in the upcoming weeks.

I watched an online episode of "Hoarders" today, in an attempt to make myself feel slightly better about the constant state of chaos that my home is. (prompted by a facebook comment made by one of my friends) I definitely feel confident in saying that I'm in a better place than the two people they featured on the show I saw...

[And I should throw in here that my front room IS clean. I took down the Christmas tree, and packed everything away a couple days ago. I pulled out the furniture and vacuumed underneath it. So ONE room is good - for as long as I can keep the kids out of it. (just today I looked int here and saw Katrina's boots, coat, and stuffed animals - right where she dropped them when we walked in the door...)]

I just spent 30 minutes working in the kitchen (not done, but better) and now I'm feeling "inspired" to spend and hour in my bathroom and throw away some of the junk in there. (we're talking makeup and nail polish that is from my "single" days...
catch ya on the flip side!

getting closer... but still so far away!?!?!

2010-11-22T20:25:00.001-07:00

Sometimes life is hard - ya know?

We have worked really hard for the past 6+ months with Aaron. We have paid out a huge chunk of time and money to go through the "Learning Technics - Physio-Neuro therapy" program to help strengthen processes in the brain that are essential for learning. We have had him going in to see a psychologist/counselor to help deal with the feelings of depression, low self-worth, low self-confidence, negative self talk, and all that jazz. We took him to have a session with an energy healer and saw some good things from that as well. We have read a variety of all sort of books, trying to find something that interests him, we have tried to improve the way we deal with him, trying to be more loving, supportive, and building - taking care to correct when necessary but trying to always BUILD, not tear down. I have tried hard to take more time to spend with him, one on one, to strengthen our relationship and help him feel loved.

I feel like I (we) have done everything I know to do - and then some... and I firmly believe we ARE seeing results. Twice in the last week I have gone down to tuck Aaron in at night and "caught him" reading. I tuck him in at night and when I say "i love you" he says "I love you too" instead of "why?" or "whatever" or starting to cry because he just can't believe anyone loves him... As I recently reported, he got 6 A's and 4 B's on his last report card. That is BY FAR the best he has EVER done! While he still usually does poorly on his spelling pretests, using the "learning technics" method of studying his list, he is getting 100% on most tests!

I am super proud of him and I KNOW we are making progress. - That is why it threw me for a loop today when I was asked by a teacher if I had ever considered having Aaron tested and placed on an IEP so that assignment and testing accommodations could be made for him. I just wanted to scream NO NO NO!!!

Rest assured - I didn't scream. I calmly explained that yes, it had been suggested once before - near the end of last year, but that I would only do that as a LAST resort. (and we aren't there yet...) In all of my observational experience, once a kid is labeled - once they are in that "special needs group." They just resign themselves to it and fulfill the label. I also know that Aaron already feels like he is in the "stupid kids" group for reading, math and spelling - and that he is pretty vocal (and feels badly) about that. I explained to the teacher exactly HOW MUCH growth I have seen in Aaron this year, and I gave specific examples. After hearing the differences (and being quite shocked that what they are is seeing IS such an improvement from past years - it's kinda hard to believe when there is still SO far to go...) The teacher agreed that we should probably just hold off and see if he continues the improvement before risking the label.

AM I WRONG???

I know that what we are doing is helping. It just has to be. It can't be my imagination and wishful thinking can it? Please tell me I am doing the right thing... Sometimes I wonder if we should just move and then have him repeat a grade. I feel guilty about this whole mess. I feel like a lot of it is my fault. He is a boy with a late summer birthday - I can't help but think that if I had just held him back one more year - it really would have made a difference. I know, I know - no use crying over spilled milk and all that - but this is my child. I love him and my heart aches for him.

It's just so hard to do everything you know to do, and it still just isn't enough...

Halloween 2010

2010-11-20T13:31:00.000-07:00

So Halloween came while we were in Hawaii, and it fell on the weekend, which is when our friends Aaron and Holly had the kids. Friday they got to go to the Novell work party, and then trick or treat around the offices. They got TONS of candy, which was great since on Saturday night it was cold and stormy.

Here are some photos Holly took.

you can see just by looking at Aaron and Holly (aka the big bad wolf and little piggy) why my kids love them so much eh? just too much fun!

and notice Katina's makeup job. Holly's a PRO!

Thanks Aaron and Holly - for making a great Halloween for our kids! Youa re the greatest adopted aunt and uncle ever!

being 'schooled' by Bryan

2010-11-18T20:59:00.001-07:00

This is my little man, Bryan. I just can't adequately express in words how much fun he is. He has me laughing at least a couple of times each day. He is also a little story teller. He just talks and talks and talks. (like his mother you say??? Well, maybe just a wee bit)

So, today Bryan was yammering away at me about something or other. Whatever he was going on about wasn't making a whole lot of sense to me, so I had mostly tuned him out. Then he said something that caught my attention:

""blah blah blah.. the parachuting chicken... blah blah blah..."

I looked at him and said, "Wait. What is a parachuting chicken?"

He looked at me like I was a total IDIOT and said, "it's a chicken that parachutes."

The look on his face was just priceless, like he couldn't believe his mother was so clueless. I just nodded my head and said, "Oh, of course. Go on with your story." But inside I was laughing SO hard!

I'm just sayin'...

2010-11-18T16:49:00.001-07:00

So, you know how kids are so brutally honest?

I'll admit that I am not the best housekeeper in the world... in fact, I'm pretty far onto the opposite side of the housekeeping spectrum! As such, I've certainly had my fair share of neighborhood kids announcing to me that I should clean my house because it is messy, and things like that.

Its been happening for years, and I always feel that pang of guilt and that "I'm such a terrible wife and mother" internal response.

So - it happened again last week, little neighborhood girl makes a comment - which is kinda funny cause I've actually been doing BETTER at the whole "trying to keep the house picked up" thing - and I start to feel badly. Then I had the thought:

"My house can't be all that bad a place to be, 'cause they all keep coming back, and they never seem to want to go home to their own 'clean' houses..."

Not to mention that fact that

"...of course it's easier for their mom's to keep their houses clean - they are always playing (and making messes) over here!"

Case in point - I just took inventory on my kids, and in addition to my own 4 kids - there are 8 other kids playing at my house right now. That's 12 kids that want drinks (count 'em, that's 12 different cups to wash), 12 kids that get hungry and want snacks, drop wrappers on the floor, play with toys and spread them throughout the house, run in and out of the house tracking in sand, dirt, leaves, and who knows what all else...

So maybe my house isn't the cleanest (and I know I can and should do better, but that isn't the point of this rambling post) -
but the truth of the matter is... the kids sure seem to enjoy coming here - and they keep coming back, so I'm just saying - I can't be all that bad!

Recipes...

2010-11-17T08:39:00.001-07:00

I posted on Facebook yesterday that we had Black Bean and Pumpkin Chili for dinner, with ginger pumpkin scones on the side, and I had several people ask for the recipe. It is way easier to post it here than in the tiny space provided on facebook, so here they are: Enjoy!

Black Bean 'n Pumpkin Chili

1 medium onion, chopped
1 medium sweet yellow pepper, chopped
2 tablespoons olive oil
3 garlic cloves, minced
3 cups Chicken Broth
2 cans (15 ounces each) black beans, rinsed and drained
2-1/2 cups cubed cooked turkey (I usually use Chicken because that what I have on hand)
1 can (15 ounces) solid-pack pumpkin
1 can (14-1/2 ounces) diced tomatoes, undrained
2 teaspoons dried parsley flakes
2 teaspoons chili powder
1-1/2 teaspoons dried oregano
1-1/2 teaspoons ground cumin
1/2 teaspoon salt

Directions

In a large skillet, saute the onion, yellow pepper in oil until tender. Add garlic; cook 1 minute longer. Transfer to a 5-qt. slow cooker; stir in the remaining ingredients. Cover and cook on low for 4-5 hours or until heated through. Yield: 10 servings (2-1/2 quarts).

Pumpkin Ginger Scones

2 cups all-purpose flour
7 tablespoons plus 1 teaspoon sugar, divided
2 teaspoons baking powder
1 teaspoon ground cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon ground ginger
1/4 teaspoon baking soda
5 tablespoons cold butter, divided
1 egg, lightly beaten
1/4 cup canned pumpkin
1/4 cup sour cream

Directions

In a large bowl, combine the flour, 7 tablespoons sugar, baking powder, cinnamon, salt, ginger and baking soda. Cut in 4 tablespoons butter until mixture resembles coarse crumbs. Combine the egg, pumpkin and sour cream; stir into dry ingredients just until moistened.
Turn onto a floured surface; knead 10 times. Pat into an 8-in. circle. Cut into eight wedges. Separate wedges and place on a greased baking sheet. Melt remaining butter; brush over dough. Sprinkle with remaining sugar.
Bake at 425° for 15-20 minutes or until golden brown. Serve warm. Yield: 8 scones.

* note, for dinner scones (as opposed to more dessert like scones), I don't usually sprinkle the sugar on top of them. also note that it makes 8 LARGE scones

Courtesy of Aaron:

2010-11-09T08:36:00.007-07:00

He's a funny kid, this one...

so, a few nights ago Aaron comes into the kitchen after taking a shower and says, "mom do I smell good?"

I smelled his proffered arm and answered, "You certainly smell nice and CLEAN. Why do you ask?"

"I used SOAP. For the first time EVER!" he said. (his answer just cracked me up. I laughed about it all night (and into the next day). Apparently I've left out a few lessons in the personal hygiene arena or something...) And before you turn me in to DCFS - I promise that he has been washed with SOAP at least a few times in his life...

On a SUPER HAPPY note - Aaron got his report card for term one and he earned 6 A's and 4 B's!!!!!!!
I am SO proud of him! We have been working really hard - in a lot of ways - for the past 6 months, and while he is still (and always will be "Aaron," he is really making some great progress in so many ways!

I just LOVE that kid!

Hawaii Vacation Day 8 (last day)

2010-11-01T13:44:00.050-06:00

Our last day in Hawaii... (bummer, I love it here and don't think I ever want to leave)

Today we got up, packed up all of our stuff, checked out of the hotel, and headed out to the North Shore.

this is the foyer/front desk of our hotel. To give you the general idea - I was sitting the car to take the photo. it was just wide open! I loved it!

Our first stop was the Dole Plantation. It didn't open until 9:30, and we had to be out at the airfield by 11:00, so we didn't have a lot of time here. We went on the walking audio tour (in the POURING rain) and it was very nice. Lots of interesting plants to enjoy and I learned a lot about the produce/food exports of Hawaii. - - Did you know that it takes 18 months after planting before you can harvest a ripe pineapple!?!?! I found that absolutely incredible! (and they don't grow on trees either. They grow on these short spiky plants...)


if you click to enlarge you'll be able to see the rain just pouring down!

Add caption

One of the plants I liked was the "birds of paradise" plant - I just think they are cool looking. In the picture above you can see a larger plant, and below a close up.

From there we went out to the Dillingham Airfield where Tim had signed up to take a beginning flight lesson on this crazy flying machine (I don't remember what it was called) that was like part motorcycle, part hang glider, and part airplane. I chose to skip this activity, (what with my intense fear of heights and my serious motion sickness issues) but I have to admit it did look pretty cool - and the pictures he brought back were amazing! (I don't know how to get them from the disk to the computer, so you'll just have to take my word for it until I can get some posted.

all suited up, buckled in, and ready to go!

taxiing back down the runway before take off

After Tim's flight - which he really enjoyed, we made a quick stop at the North Shore Soap Factory, and then popped in for a Matsumoto's shaved ice. (I know everyone says you "have" to get a Matsumoto shaved ice... but to me it just tasted like regular shaved ice... I kinda wish I had spent my money and calories on a pineapple ice cream at the Dole plant instead...)

As we continued along, we stopped at a spot along the road that locals call "turtle beach" (or something like that). It is not marked, but with so many cars parked along the road it is hard to miss. We watched the sea turtles swimming in the waves and that was really cool, PLUS there were two big girls that were up on the beach sunning themselves. They are amazing animals.

We continued on to the Waimea Valley, where we toured the botanical garden as we hiked to the falls. It was so GORGEOUS! I just couldn't get enough!

We bought lunch at the Waimea snack bar - I had a Mahi Mahi (fish) sandwich. It was pretty yummy, with garlic fries. Notice our little peacock friend, just hanging around waiting for us to drop food.

It was amazing to me that even through we had been here for a week, and tours multiple botanical gardens, we kept seeing "new" flowers. It was really spectacular. Tim and I both through these were pretty interesting looking.

Tim chose to wear his swimsuit and swim out under the falls, but since we were going to the airport right after this, I opted to stay dry... and I was only a "little" jealous!

It was almost time for the sunset by the time we got back to the car, so we just went over to the Waimea beach park and sat there watching the big waves roll in and watching the sunset. A "surge" was scheduled to come in the following day so the waves were already on the rise. It was fun watching the people surfing/body surfing. Tim went and and gave it a try, but stopped after he got SLAMMED into the sand pretty hard.

Tim heading into the waves

I know it's kinda hard to tell, but check out the curl on this baby!

a beautiful sunset to cap off a wonderful vacation

After the sun was down, we started out for the airport. We had pre-paid for a tank of gas, so we wanted to return the car with as little gas as possible, but we were riding on EMPTY and I was getting super nervous. I was having visions of us running out of gas and missing our flight all all sorts of fun scenarios like that. Tim was trying to convince me that you don't really run out of gas when it is on empty... that they always build in some leeway cause they know people like to push the limits...


here you can see the gas gauge (the small on in the center) - and the LOW FUEL warning message in the lower right corner - it was at this point Tim said, "yeah, it's getting a little low."

Apparently I didn't buy Tim's logic, because we got to a little town with some gas stations - I picked one and pulled right in.

This is after we added a gallon. the name of this picture is "Jeri's peace of mind"

We returned our rental car, took the shuttle over to the terminal, then the nightmare began! Getting through the agricultural checkpoint, checking in our bag, and going through security were all awful! Due to the mail bomb scares that took place while we were on vacation, airport security had been tightened, and the lines were HORRIBLE! Plus when we tried to check in our bag, we found that it was 10 lbs overweight, and we either had to dump 10 lbs or pay an extra $75! So we sat on the floor of the airport, opened up the bag and started deciding what we could throw away. We managed to transfer most of the stuff from our suitcase into our carry-ons, threw out a couple little nothings... and we just barely managed to squeeze it all in - but it made our carry-on bags extra heavy, bulky, and awkward.

Back at the airport - a funny story about this picture. I was standing by the statue, waiting for Tim to take the picture, and I happened to looked up. Wouldn't you just know it - the sculptor didn't bother to put a swimsuit - or loin cloth - or anything... on this guy. HELLO!?!?!? Is a little modesty asking too much?

Our flight left Honolulu at 10pm Monday night, and after another 2 hour stopover in PHX, we arrived back in SLC at 1:00pm, Tuesday afternoon.

flying over the Grand Canyon (we couldn't see it on the way out cause it was super cloudy that day - the whole flight)

It was great to get home and see the kids. It was nice to feel loved and missed.

My sweet kids (3 of them at least) in their "Hawaii clothes."

Postscript - the first full day back (Wed) I was totally ready to be home. I was loving being with the kids, enjoying working hard to get all the laundry caught up, etc... Reality set in by Thursday I was feeling major OVERLOAD and was totally ready to go back to Hawaii.

Hey Tim - It was a WONDERFUL vacation! THANK YOU! I love you!

Hawaii Vacation Day 7

2010-10-31T09:26:00.000-06:00

Today was Sunday. We got up early and got ready for church long before we "needed to," so that we had time to made the drive back up to the Pali lookout - with the hope that we would get a good view this time.

It was beautiful, and historical, as this is the site where King Kamehameha I defeated Oahu's defending army and united the Hawaiian Islands as one. If you are interested in the history, enlarge the next photo and you can read about what happened here.

Because you are standing above these huge cliffs, the views were amazing. We were glad we made the drive back out.

We drove back to Honolulu and still had just under an hour before church started, so we drove to see the statue of King Kamehameha and the Iolani Palace.

King Kamehameha statue

Iolani Palace

The Iolani Palace is the only royal palace on US soil that was used as an official residence by a reigning monarch. We had hoped to be able to tour the palace, but we didn't have time to get there during business hours during the week, and the palace wasn't open for tours on Sunday, so we just walked around the grounds and took some pictures of the exterior. (guess we'll have to make sure we visit there on our NEXT trip, eh?)

Iolani Palace again, in the background. The Gazebo on our right is where they held the coronation ceremonies

We got to church to find that we were meeting in the historic Honolulu tabernacle. What an BEAUTIFUL building!!!! It was designed by the same architect that designed the Laie Temple. The tower/steeple of the tabernacle was one of the highest points in Honolulu, second only to the Aloha tower, and it has a beacon light in the tower. During the war, the pilots would use the beacon to help guide them in to Pearl Harbor.

There was a beautiful courtyard in the center, (see photo below) with all the classrooms, cultural hall, and offices built around it. It was a little challenging to find where we were supposed to go for Sunday School, but we eventually got to the right room. It was really beautiful! I would TOTALLY love to meet every Sunday in this building. (Except if the lessons were too boring, I be super tempted to wander out and just sit under the Plumeria tree in the courtyard.

This is the center courtyard...from where this picture was taken, chapel is straight ahead, cultural hall 1 (they have 2) is to the right, bishops office, clerks office, etc are to the left, and the primary room, library, and a couple of smaller class rooms are behind me.

this is the clerks office. Since that is where Tim spends his "calling time" I took a picture.

The rest of our Sunday was pretty laid back, ending with a lovely “Sunset Dinner Cruise” on the "star of Honolulu. (we had pre-paid it, so it was nice to be able to go through the Sabbath and not spend any money. (felt like we were at least trying to keeping the Sabbath Day holy; vacation style...)

Enjoying my "welcome aboard" Mai Tai (the non-alcoholic version, of course!)

Tim was part of the dinner entertainment. (i was just trying to keep my feet (and stomach) under control, so no hula for me

On the ship, just leaving the harbor - with the Aloha Tower in the background

yummy dinner... and I just have to say, while i don't like Poi, I really like the purplish Taro Rolls!

Today was also Halloween, and apparently in HI. they go NUTS with it. (and it is NOT “G” rated!) They closed off some of the streets in Waikiki and the people dress up in their costumes (or lack there-of) and just wander up and down the streets partying. I had taken a Dramamine to help me get through the cruise, so when we got home from the cruise, I took a quick soak in the hotel hot tub, then promptly fell asleep. Poor Tim said that he heard the partying down on the street (screaming, yelling, etc...) going on until after 3 am, but I slept through it all.

LUCKY ME!

Hawaii Vacation Day 6

2010-10-30T13:43:00.001-06:00

The first thing on the schedule for this morning was to hike to Manoa Falls. It was really fun to find that after about a 20 minutes drive from downtown Waikiki we found ourselves totally in a rain forest environment and you would never guess that just a few minutes away is the "big city." When we got there, we couldn't figure out where to park the car... the signs were quite confusing. We drove up the hill to a place called the Lyon Arboretum. (the sign there were pretty clear that there was NO PARKING for Manoa Falls - but we were just hoping someone there could tell us where we were supposed to park.

This is Kona, the dog that apparently lives at the Arboretum. He was a little sweet heart.

It was 8am and they didn't open until 9, but the guy happened to drive up at the same time we got there. We asked him where were supposed to park, and in the course of the conversation, he said he'd open up early for us and we could explore the arboretum. IT WAS INCREDIBLE!!! We had planned to visit the Foster Botanical Garden, in downtown Honolulu, tomorrow; but we will skip that now. As you can see from the pictures, we were hiking through beautiful rain forest country, and we were the ONLY ones there.

overlooking the arboretum at the begin of our adventure

some people might think this is just some cute little mushrooms growing on a tree stump. I believe it a fairy umbrella shop. so there!

see all those cute little fairy umbrella's???

It took us a couple hours - and almost 100 pictures of plants and flowers - to get back to the visitor's center. (the guy had said it would take us about an hour... little did he know how much I love plants and flowers!) We hiked all around the Arboretum and up to a small waterfall, the Aihualama Falls.

We literally didn't see another person until we got back to the visitors center. I TOTALLY recommend this place. (even if you go when they are regularly open and there are other people there. It is BEAUTIFUL!!!

We also saw a whole bunch of wild Cockatoos – they are loud little buggers!

if you click to enlarge you'll see a pretty good shot of one of the Cockatoos. (same with the next photo)

This stop was not one that we had planned, in fact, we hadn't even heard or read anything about it – but I am SO glad we "got lost" and found this fabulous treasure!!!!

This video clip below is of Tim swinging on the giant 'vines' of a Banyan tree. The seeds germinate and send down roots to the ground. (that's actually what the vine looking things are - roots seeking the ground) He had been eyeballing them for several days, but never found some that were sturdy enough to swing on. These suckers were MASSIVE. After Tim, I tried to swing, and found that I couldn't even get my hands around the vine and grip enough to hang on at all!

After the Arboretum, the man at the desk gave us permission to leave our car in their parking lot and we walked down to the trail head of the Manoa Falls hike. It was really interesting that we were so close to the botanical garden, yet the hike was such a different experience. Still very rain forest-y, yet way fewer flowers, and way more people. It's a very popular hike for people of all ages. The falls here were much taller, and the hike iss super MUDDY, (which makes it slippery!) but it was still a great hike! Note to any future hikers - pick up a walking stick at the trail head. you will be glad you did - especially on the way back down!

at the trail head

hiking up to Manoa Falls

at the falls

back at the car... I was MUDDY!

After the morning hikes, we went back to Waikiki for lunch at the Ala Moana Center food court (I was told it was the best on the island and I'm telling you... it was MASSIVE!!!

(There were so many places to chose from it was really hard to decide where to eat, but I ended up having a yummy YUMMY BBQ chicken Panini with a side Caesar Salad.)

After lunch we walked back over to the bay for our surf/paddle boarding lessons. I have to admit that I was not super excited about this particular activity that Tim planned. I was a little nervous about it actually – but it was GREAT!

We were on HUGE boards (easier for beginners) so I was able to balance pretty well, I only fell off 2 times. I was really proud of myself because our instructor said I had really good paddling form. It was really fun and I would definitely do it again. As an added bonus, we got to see several sea turtles! They were just hanging out in the bay swimming around and they'd just pop up out of the water to get some air then dive back down. It was fun!
Tim of course, was a natural, so he and our instructor went out beyond the breakers to try to catch some waves. It was a TERRIBLE location to try to surf – the coral was only about 4 feet under them, and they both ended up getting come coral “slivers” in their toes.

you have to enlarge to seethe little coral slivers in poor Tim's big toe :(

After stopping back at the hotel for a quick call home to the kids, a shower, and a trip to the ABC store to buy tweezers and sewing kit (for removal of the aforementioned slivers), we for a walk down to the beach to hopefully catch some photos of a good sunset. Not a super amazing sunset, but it was still the beach (which I LOVE), the sunset was OK, and we watched these cool black crabs climbing on the rocks. They were SO fast!

these two picture below make me laugh. they were taken one right after another, just using different settings (none of which I was even aware of on my camera.) The guy we snagged to take the picture knew more about my camera than I did. I think it is funny that one looks like it was taken in the dark of night, and you can just barely make out Diamond head in the background, and the other looks like it is daytime. Needless to say, after seeing these pictures I did a bit of playing with my camera trying to figure out how in the heck to work it!

As we were getting ready to walk back to the hotel, we happened to see this guy packing up his trained parrots. (used for tourist photo ops.) We paid a small fee and used our own camera and got these fun pictures. It was so GREAT!!! I was totally loving it!!!

Hawaii Vacation Day 5

2010-10-29T13:20:00.000-06:00

Our first planned stop for this morning was to check out the view (and hike) at the Pali Lookout. We got there to find ourselves in the middle of a HEAVY rainstorm. It was just pouring down. We ran out to the lookout just in case, but we really couldn't see anything at all - - and we got really wet in the process.


see - that big wall of clouds behind Tim was our "view" over the Pali Cliffs

From there, our next stop was the Valley of the Temples.

It was absolutely beautiful and serene. The history of the area (as I understood it from the tour bus driver who drove us out to the PCC on Wed.) was that when all the people moved here from their various places of origin, the Hawaiian government designated this particular valley for them to build their temples or holy places.

Now it is home for the various temples, memorials, and a cemetery. (including a Pet Cemetery, out by the main road.)

The Byodo-In Temple was so amazing. I just LOVE Japanese gardens, they have such a calming effect and are so peaceful!

Next was a stop at the Macadamia nut farm. They have a tour there that sounded really nice, but it sounded a lot like the things we had already seen at the PCC, plus it was it was $20 per person, plus we wanted to make sure we had plenty of time to visit the LDS Temple open house in Laie and the PCC (again) – which gave us several good reasons to skip on the tour. We did get to taste lots of YUMMY samples.

Next stop was the Kualoa Ranch, another place that offers some really cool tours (like the 4-wheeler tours back up into the filming locations from Jurassic Park and Lost...) but time and financial limitations meant we just looked around a bit, then were back on the road towards Laie.

Along the way we were able to catch glimpses of the gorgeous valley's (and shores) where scenes from Lost, Jurassic Park, Fantasy Island, Karate Kid 2(and many others) were filmed. We also took pictures of the Crouching Lion (Elvis) and the "Sleeping Giant" (Hawaiian Legend about a boy who kept falling asleep when he was supposed to be guarding the fishing pond)

click to enlarge, then look closely and you may find the "Crouching Lion." (he's right in the center of the photo)

click to enlarge and then look closely - and you may see the outline of "the sleeping giant." he has his feet down towards the ocean and he is sleeping with his mouth open - (hope that helps you find him)

Next stop was the Open House of the Laie Hawaii LDS Temple. While I wish the temple had been dedicated so we could have done a session – this was the next best thing. I felt AWFUL that we were so under dressed (and looking ragged due to the rains all morning) – but we fit right in with many of the other visitors. The temple was such a BEAUTIFUL and peaceful place, inside and out!

We finished out the day a the PCC. They have a thing where if you go one day, you can come back within 3 days at no cost. (a bounce back kinda thing.) I seriously wondered if it was worth going back, since I felt like we saw everything on our Ambassador, guided tour, the first time we were there. After visiting again, I've decided that 2 days was PERFECT! We were able to self-guide ourselves through the different villages. We saw two shows that we missed on the tour (New Zealand and Fiji) as well as try a few of the activities that we skipped on the tour.

I got to make a Kukui nut bracelet (that I LOVE!)

and we played some Hawaiian games that were similar to bowling and checkers. (I beat Tim at the bowling one (beginners luck), but lost both times at the checkers-like game.)

We took the opportunity to walk through many of the houses in the different villages. It was nice not having kids with us, so we could take as much time as we wanted, reading the plaques and learning all sorts of interesting things. (like in one culture when the daughter becomes "of age" they partition off an end of the house for her. The boys? They would build a new house for them and they are basically kicked out of the family house.

If I remember correctly, this is a "family house" in either Tahiti or Tonga. I loved all the Tapa cloth - made from bark.

This guy was HILARIOUS! He did the show in "Samoa" and had the audience just laughing the whole time! I didn't get a good photo the 1st day, but on the 2nd day we were there I happened to see him just sitting on the grass weaving, so I took the opportunity to get a picture.

In "Fiji" we got some 'tattoos'. Here is Tim with his "warrior" tattoo (and expression)

this is a replica of a "woman's work" house in Hawaii

We ended the evening with the “haunted lagoon” ride. It was fun.

They took a great picture of us with some "characters," including the dude from Avatar, Yoda, Capt. Jack Sparrow and more, but we just couldn't bring ourselves to pay yet another $18.00 for picture. So we just settled for a photo next to this crazy lookin' thing!

USoSL p.s. - (I may someday get around to cropping the photo so you can see the lions better, but not today... ) These stone lions were guarding a family plot in the Valley of the Temples

Hawaii Vacation Day 4 (what a workout!)

2010-10-28T07:07:00.001-06:00

I was DEAD tired and had a hard time waking up this morning. Tim got up at 5:30 to take care of some real estate stuff he had going on back in Provo. (he had a client that had a closing scheduled for today so he wanted to review all the documents before they went in to sign everything) I woke up just before 7 and dragged myself around like dead weight until about 8, when we hit the road for another day of adventure.

Today was the day of “exercise fun.” We started the day by hiking to the top of Diamond Head crater.

It was a HIKE, only 1.5 miles round trip but a steep rise. The views were AMAZING though. Well worth the hike to get up there.

see that little spot WAY up at the top??? That's the goal.


some of the many steps to the top

almost to the top

We made it!

if you click on this one to enlarge it you can see the map better and read a little of the history

Then we continued driving around the south shore, to the Hanauma Nature Reserve. It was GORGEOUS just to look at from the parking area above. My friend Angel had a great experience snorkeling here when she came to Hawaii 6 years ago and she insisted that we come here. (she even paid for it - as her birthday present to me) THANK YOU ANGEL - it really was a spectacular experience!


our first look at Hanauma bay - just beautiful

First we had to watch a movie about how the bay was formed and how to snorkel there without killing the coral, the we hiked down the STEEP hill to the beach where we rented our snorkel gear. (lucky for me they had “optical masks” so I could actually see under the water.)


another view of the bay (and the coral reef) as we were hiking down....

After a few instructions at the information booth for the “beginner” (ME), we went snorkeling. It was really cool! We saw a ton of bright and colorful fish, plus 2 sea turtles (they were AWESOME) and I saw a little octopus guy. The only downside? My underwater camera that Tim bought specifically for this trip worked for the 1st hour, but then started acting up. We weren't sure what the problem was and didn't want to push our luck so we took the camera back in to the beach and left it there while we went back out. Wouldn't you just know it that THAT was when we saw the octopus and the turtles... and now some pictures...


an underwater shot of Tim

Here you can see where Tim gashed his knee on the coral. It probably should have been stitched, but instead he just let it bleed off and on for 3 days :)

here we are, taking a break on the beach - in all of our lily white/land lubber/more concerned about skin cancer than being tanned - beauty!

After Hanauma Bay, we stopped a further down the coast to see the Halona Blowhole. It was fun to watch - but frustrating to try and get a picture... you could never tell which wave was going to hit it just right to get it to spout

here is a short video (30 seconds) where you can see it spout pretty well. (it was more cool in person, or course.)

Next was the Makupu'u lighthouse.(little did I know it was another strenuous hike. OK, maybe not “strenuous," the guide book called it “moderate” but after our earlier hike, (which was labeled strenuous) plus several hours of snorkeling and sun at Hanauma Bay, my body was getting a little tired!) this hike was 2 miles long RT, and a steady UPHILL all the way! I was dragging by the top – but once again... GORGEOUS views!

view looking along the windward side of the island

We thought we saw a whale spout or two, but it was a little too far away for us to be absolutely certain about that... :(

We stood on top of the hill and watched a small rain storm blow in off the ocean until it hit us. (can you see it coming right at us?)

getting closer

After hiking back down, we headed back to Waikiki via H3 – the newest interstate built in HI. (finished in 1992 if I remember correctly) Known as one of the most beautiful and EXPENSIVE highways in the country. It was a bit longer to go this way, but we wanted to check it out.

On our way back to the hotel we stopped in Chinatown for a quick stroll and dinner.

Proud to finally be a member of USoSL - (a photo of just the lion below)

And FINALLY - for Charlotte and fellow USoSL members -

guarding a driveway along the south shore of Oahu, HI.

Chinatown, Honolulu, HI.

Hawaii Vacation day 3 (mostly the PCC)

2010-10-27T16:51:00.001-06:00

After looking again at our schedule, and realizing how much time (and money) we were going to spend trying to ride shuttles and trolleys... while still needing to rent a car at least a couple more days, we decided it would be cheaper (and WAY more convenient) to just bite the bullet and rent a car now for the week. We got a better deal online than from the hotel travel desk, which means we had to get back to the airport to pick up the car. We were racing against the clock, since we had already arranged for (and PAID for) the shuttle van to come pick us up and take us out to the Polynesian Cultural Center for the day. It was scheduled to pick us up at the hotel at 10:10...

The hotel called a shuttle to take us over to the airport. We had been told by several people that the best place to buy souvenirs is at the Swap Meet, held every Wed, Sat., and Sun at the Aloha Stadium. For all of you planning trips to Hawaii in the future... here is my TIP: Plan to go to Pearl Harbor on a Wed, Sat, or Sun... since the stadium is right by to Pearl Harbor. We were pretty busy on Saturday, and I didn't want to go "shopping" on Sunday, so this was pretty much "it" if we were going to go. We picked up our rental car and raced over to the stadium (only about 2 miles from the airport). We figured it would take us 30 - 35 minutes to get back to the hotel, so we had only 20 minutes to do all of our shopping! Luckily I don't like to shop, so I didn't really feel bad about not having lots of shopping time, I just hated feeling rushed. All I can say is:

"See Tim and Jeri."

"See Tim and Jeri RUN!"

We found some great gifts for reasonable prices, then drove as fast as we dared to get back to the hotel.

We made it just in time. (a few minutes late actually, but the shuttle had just gotten there and started looking for us - so it was all good!) We weren't too worried, knowing that if we missed it, we now had a car and could just drive ourselves out, but I was glad we rode the shuttle. One reason is that the driver was able to tell us tons of cool information as we drove. We learned lots of interesting things about the island's history and plants (like the army parking their planes underneath the HUGE canopies of the Monkey Pod trees so they weren't visible from the air), and as we drove past different locations he would tell us what movies had been filmed there (Karate Kid 2, Fantasy Island, The Crouching Lion from Elvis's movie Blue Hawaii, and Jurassic Park... just to name a few), PLUS we didn't have to pay for the gas. (Gas on Oahu while we were there was in the $3.50/gal range - it adds up REALLY fast!)

this is a photo of the island known as "China Man's Hat"

We arrived at the PCC just before noon.

We had paid for the Ambassador package, which included the dinner and a tour guide to be with us all day to make sure we got the most out of our visit. Our tour guide for the day was "Cousin EJ." Here he is showing us how to make Poi (which tastes pretty bland and yucky!)

We had a GREAT time. We learned some dances, weaved fish from coconut leaves, ate dinner at the Luau (where I accidentally took a bite of raw fish...eewwww!) and saw many of the shows and demonstrations presented by the different villages.

Here we are seeing how to make Tahitian Coconut Bread. (and we got to taste it too)

Learning a hula dance in "Hawaii"

Here are our angel fish

This is the Iosepa, the voyaging Canoe named after Joseph F. Smith (pronouced "yo-sepa")

visiting the "Easter Islands" (photo with what some tour guides lovingly call the Jackson 5)

The 6 islands represented at the P.C.C. are:

TONGA,

SAMOA,

Aotearoa (New Zealand),

HAWAII,

TAHITI,

and FIJI

My favorite shows were the ones from Tonga, (the drum show) and the one from Samoa (the guy was SO hilarious!!!)

After the luau and watching the IMAX movie (the last 1/2 of it anyway), we went to the evening show - "Ha' breath of Life." It was really amazing! this last picture is the closing scene/pose from the show. We were right in the center on the 2nd row, so you can't quite see the whole stage in the picture... but they were AWESOME seats!

Another reason we were glad that we didn't drive out, is because it was pretty late when the show got out, and that, combined with all the walking and sun that day... we were tired on the way home. (I dozed off and on all the way back) We got back to hotel just after 11pm. I'm pretty sure I was asleep before Tim even finished brushing his teeth.

Hawaii Vacation - Day 2 (a somber day of remembering...)

2010-10-26T23:53:00.003-06:00

Today we rented a car and drove out to Pearl Harbor.

On the way over, we saw our first "Hawaiian Rainbow." It was beautiful! (not so much in the photo, but you can get the general idea) you could see the whole arc, end to end.

First we watched a 30 minute video about the events of Pearl Harbor, then we went out to the Arizona Memorial,

the USS Battleship Missouri - as seen from the Arizona Memorial.
(which we would later go over and tour)

then we took tours of the USS Bowfin (submarine),

Cramped sleeping quarters above, teeny tiny bathroom below... talks about serious claustrophobia... I could NOT serve on a submarine. It was hard enough to be in those cramped space for the hour long audio tour.

the Pearl Harbor Museum, In this museum we saw a replica of a nuclear war head. That thisng was MASSIVE! (and scary!) I know we took some picutres of it, but I can't find them. (Don't know why??? We only have over 700 photos of the trip?!?!?! Go figure!

and "The Mighty MO." (USS Battleship Missouri).

These anchor chains were really incredible. Each individual link weighed over 100 lbs! I'm think it was 104lbs or 124lbs or something close to that...) I don't remember all the exact specifics now, like how many links there were per chain and how heavy the anchors were, but trust me when I say it was massively H.E.A.V.Y.!!

this (above) is Tim leaning over the side to take a picture of the spot where a Japaneses Kamikaze pilot crashed into the side on the ship, and here below is the spot - you can see the indentation it caused.

This spot is where the Peace Treaty ending WWII was signed in Tokyo Bay on September 2, 1945

After leaving Pearl Harbor, we then drove up to The Punchbowl Crater where we visited the National Memorial Cemetery of the Pacific.

I loved how they shaped many of the trees into wreaths.

Both of these visits were rather serious and somber, but it was a wonderful opportunity to reflect on how grateful I am to live in this country and how I need to more consistently remember and honor the memory of all those who gave their lives to ensure our freedoms. (and the terrible price paid by their families...)

One funny thing about this day was our lunch. At Pearl Harbor the only thing they offered at the snack bar was soup (that didn't look great to me) ice cream (not really "lunch") or hot dogs. We opted for the hot dogs. They weren't very good. (Blech!) Then we were totally bummed to get out to the USS Missouri to find a real snack bar - with REAL food! For the rest of the vacation, this became our standard joke when we were figure out what to eat for lunch or dinner,
"I don't want a hot dog..."

On the way back to our hotel we found a grocery store bought some food for our breakfasts, lunches, and snacks. Milk there is ridiculously expensive! At the local ABC stores (you see them on about every other corner in Waikiki) you have to pay over $5 for 1/2 gallon!!!

We also bought some dinner at the grocery deli and drove to the beach to each our dinner. It was dark already... but I didn't care. I love the beach and wanted to eat there anyway, so Tim humored me.

PS: FOR CHARLOTTE

photo taken in the Punchbowl Crater a the N.M.C.of the P. (not official abbreviation, I just didn't want to type it all out - so instead I typed all of this out) in Honolulu HI., so I can officially be a member of USoSL (more lions to come)

and just for old times sake... does this lovely photo remind you of anything???

Hawaii Vacation - Day 1 (not exciting... just the flight over)

2010-10-25T23:51:00.001-06:00

My mom arrived at our house at 7:45, and we left for the airport. We flew out of SLC at 10:30 am, took the short hop to Phoenix, 2 hour layover, boarded the plane, then sat at the gate for an hour while they checked out a "mechanical failure warning light." The mechanics finally determined that while the part in question was indeed not working, we could still safely fly the plane, so off we went. 6 long, uncomfortable hours later, we arrived in Honolulu, Hawaii just after 6pm (10pm Utah time). We collected our suitcase, figured out which bus to take ($9 each), made the 30 minute drive through crazy traffic into downtown Waikiki, and finally got to our hotel, the Maile Sky Court.

I loved that the hotel check in counter - the whole lobby in fact, is basically outside. It's covered, and has big shutters around the lobby that they can close, but it is pretty much like sitting outside on a partially enclosed porch. After putting our stuff in our room, we went out for walk and to search for dinner. We found some mobile food places - old shuttle buses, that had been converted into food kitchens. We opted for Mexican and it tasted pretty good and was not too expensive for PLENTY of food! back to the hotel and fell asleep in no time at all!

Flying West, we were chasing the sun -

our first glimpse of the island

a view of the entrance of Pearl Harbor

WE FINALLY MADE IT!

Katrina's "friend party"

2010-10-16T11:47:00.001-06:00

So, I finally did it. With our trip to Hawaii coming up so fast, I decided I couldn't put it off any longer so we had "the dreaded friend party." (it wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it was going to be... still some work, and we gave those poor girls WAY to much sugar... but they had fun. Here are a few of the many pictures from the party:

Party rule #1 - make sure dad is home... I don't think I would have made it out alive without his help.

While we were waiting for everyone to get there, and as the first game, we played "DON'T EAT THE KITTEN" (originally known as "Don't Eat Pete" which rolls off the tongue better, but didn't match the theme of the party...) To play the the game you write out a numbered grid, send one person out of the room while the rest pick out a number that is "Pete" or in our case "the kitten." The person comes back in and one by one eats the fishes (or mini m&m's), trying to NOT eat the kitten. When they reach out to eat the kitten, everyone else yells "DON"T EAT THE KITTEN!!!!" (nearly scares the poor kid to death every time - but it's fun.)

We all know that kittens love to chase and bite things tied to a string...
so here you go: doughnut on a string. (I love the look on Bryan's face in this picture.)

After they got cleaned up from the doughnut game, they each made a kitten collar and got their faces painted. Here are all of the girls in their face paint and ears. (Chloe is wearing her collar, the rest were still drying - lots and lots of glitter glue on some of them) We ended up missing about 1/2 of the girls Katrina invited, but in my opinion, it was better that way - a little less crazy. not to mention that these four are the ones she really plays with the most.

The next game was "feed the hungry kitty." We had some stretchy rats and the girls tried to flip them (or just throw them) through the kitten's empty tummy. It turned out that the rats would often stick to the poster board, and the girls thought that was HILARIOUS! (in a gross disgusting way. They would shriek and say "eewwww gross, it stuck to _______ (name the body part)," then they would laugh and laugh.) It was pretty funny to watch. The funniest was the mouse that got his tail stuck just above the stomach hole and it was swinging in and out of the hole. (didn't get a picture in time on that one)

For the next activity, each girl got to decorate her own kitten cupcake. Some actually looked kind of like kittens, others, not so much... (actually, looking at Katrina's now, I can see a kitten. look hard - it's like one of those "perspective" pictures, you know the one "do you see the young beautiful woman or the old hag? - if you have no clue what I'm talking about let me know and I'll post it)

Others still were just opportunities to "create" and get a sugar high.

After cupcakes we went downstairs and Katrina got to open her presents.

Katrina with Sadie,

and Jaislyn,

and Chloe,
and Sydney.

All in all I would say the party was a success. When it was over, all of the girls stayed for at least an hour longer just playing. It was fun. Katrina was happy with it, and that is all that mattered. This last picture is obviously Katrina the Kitty, holding Mystery - they took turns being the STAR of the party. we ended up taking a photo of each girl holding Mystery and they turned out cute. I'm thinking about getting a print made of each of those to send as the "thank you" note. (we'll see if I get around to it or not:)

Happy birthday my sweet kitty princess! We love you!

Poor Black Beauty...

2010-10-07T13:45:00.006-06:00

I have sad news today, but before I can share it - I have to give a little background and tell you that we got some little chicks last spring. (I was such a lousy blogger for SO long, I just never got around to sharing that info...) Here are some pictures that I kept meaning to post.

Katrina with her chick, Goldie

Another shot of Goldie - resting IN the food...
Caleb holding his little black chick, Hopper

Caleb staring intently at all 5 chicks - 2 red (little Ann and Big Red), 2 black(hopper and Black Beauty), and one yellow (Goldie)

Anyway, they have been fun and entertaining. They are now 6 months old and we are getting plenty of eggs (have given away several dozen too, when we can't fit more in the fridge) Goldie lays the white eggs and the rest lay brown.

When they first started laying, they didn't seem to like the nesting box and we got to go on a lot of "Easter egg hunts." One afternoon, I saw Little Ann up in my Bluebeard's Blue Mist Spirea bush.

Here is a photo of the nest we found.

They have actually been really quite tame, - not loving all the attention they get, but tolerating it for the most part.

Here is Bryan holding his chicken. She has changed names LOTS of times. Big Red, Red, Billy Bob Joe, and her current name is "Robert."

And here is Caleb holding Black Beauty. (We put little colored bands on their legs so we could tell them apart)

So, background in place, here is the SAD NEWS. They didn't get shut into their pen last night (My fault, I was being lazy and they've been left out before and nothing happened...) An animal of some kind got Black Beauty. (she was my chick) At first I thought it was Jasmine, but I really don't think it was. It was too neatly done, and the Hen was really well buried. It was sad.

I know it's "just a chicken..."

but for us... it is sad.

Katrina's birthday "Mystery"

2010-09-23T08:53:00.009-06:00

Seven years ago, (last Friday) our sweet little princess Katrina was born. As the only girl in our family, we are ever grateful for her "feminine influence." (I was certain she was going to be a boy. After she was born I kept saying, "are you sure it's a girl?") I can still remember the amazing feelings I had when she was born. Just something amazing and powerful. She has such an incredible spirit. So full of love and a desire to do what is right. I feel so blessed to be her mother. She teaches me SO much.

This year she gets a "friend party," but it hasn't happened yet. (I'm not good at planning parties anyway, and the whole "girl thing" is just WAY beyond my comfort zone!) Now that people are finally getting over this flu-like bug, I'll have to plan something.

So, she got to pick her birthday meal (she chose cheese stuffed pasta shells, with garlic bread, and salad + strawberry cake for dessert.)

The greatest part of the day was her present. She has been wanting a kitten for a LONG time. I considered it for her last birthday, but Tim wasn't ready for it. I tried again for Christmas, but again... NO. I asked again this birthday and my dear, sweet, PATIENT husband said I could get one! I found this sweet little baby girl online and went and picked her up on Friday morning. Her mom was a mix of Ocicat and Egyptian Mau. I had never heard of the Ocicat breed, but reading online that they are often considered a "dog personality" in a cat's body, I thought this might be the perfect cat for us. She is just the sweetest little thing, and Katrina was SO thrilled when she saw her. I just told Katrina that her present was in on her bed. She walked in the room got the BIGGEST grin on her face.

"A real ALIVE kitten!"

(Tim took a video of it, but I don't know how to find that so I can't post it here. maybe later)

She named her kitten "Mystery Joy Mellor" She is just a little ball of energy and fun. Katrina came in yesterday morning and said she was awake "all night" because Mystery kept trying to groom her. Mystery was holding Katrina's hand in her paws and kept licking.

Mystery and Jasmine are starting to come to terms with each other, but they are not all the way there yet.

Here is Mystery exploring the doll house. she was running up and down the stairs...
it was fun to watch

Katrina and Caleb by the "cat tree" that Katrina got with the kitten and other kitten supplies. It goes from floor to ceiling with 3 "shelves" or tiers that the cat can sit on. I thought it would be a while before Mystery figured it out, but nope, she just climbs (runs) to the top and back down like it's nothing...

playing with her new toy.
I went in that first night and Mystery was just curled up, sleeping by Katrina. SO sweet! (wish we could figure out how to stop that thumb sucking...)

She loves to sit and sleep on the windowsills.

the fruits of my labors...

2010-09-21T21:55:00.003-06:00

So - last night I didn't think I had it in me, but I guess somewhere - deep down... it was there. (barely) It doesn't look like much when you consider it took me from 6 am - 5pm, but here it is. 12 quarts of peaches, 23 quarts of pears, 4 pints of peach jam, and 4 pints of peach/pear butter.

Aaron took the picture of my jars, then he wanted to be in one, so here is my happy little photographer... (unfortunately, not a "canning helper" - this was a SOLO project, but the kids did help by keeping themselves mostly entertained throughout the day, and it only looks like a Severe Tropical Storm blew through, not a category 5 hurricane. I suppose "post storm clean-up efforts" will begin tomorrow. Wonder if the Red Cross or "federal disaster Relief funds" cover this type of "disaster."

Good night! I sure hope all the kids sleep through the night. I really need another good nights rest - and 5am walking comes awfully EARLY! There's a good question for you... why can't 5 am be LATER in the day???

Here's hoping Katrina can go back to school tomorrow...

just FYI

2010-09-20T21:41:00.003-06:00

one day into this "new week"... it's not calming down much. After volunteering at school today, cleaning carpets, running carpools, FHE, homework, some other random house cleaning (most of which has already been UN-done), and other miscellaneous stuff... I believe I am more tired tonight than I was last night... if that is even humanly possible!

I am dreading waking up in the morning - as I have a big box of pears and a smaller box of peaches, all waiting in the kitchen to be bottled.

I honestly don't know if I have it in me... I'll let you know how it goes.

glad it's a new week...

2010-09-19T20:38:00.002-06:00

It was a LONG, EXHAUSTING weekend! Friday was Katrina's birthday. I will devote a separate post to that, since who wants their "birthday post" to have rumblings of THROW-UP it it???

ya, that's what I thought! NO ONE...

Just FYI... this is a long, not really interesting to anyone but me, "journal" post - so here is the abridged version: I was running around like crazy all weekend and we have sick people at my house... There you go. Now you can click on your way and skip everything else... you are of course welcome to read on... but if you get bored it is your own fault.)

As a precursor, I will add in here that Thursday night was not a good one for sleeping - Caleb was up and down multiple times and I just didn't get a good nights sleep, so what I am saying, is that I was already pretty sleep deprived before this story begin. so... without further ado -

Friday was crazy busy- driving Bryan to preschool, driving over to AF to pick up Katrina's birthday present, then back to pick up Bryan, then to the store to buy some other birthday items and ingredients for Katrina's requested birthday meal. Then home to drop everything off, then off to pick up the kids from school. (plus two extra boys who needed to come to my house that afternoon while their mom worked. bake Katrina's cake and put the dinner together, then off to drop off the boys and take Aaron to learning technics. home at 5:30, get rest of dinner put together. Finally, sitting down to eat, Trina only picked at her food, and in the back of my mind I wondered why. It tasted fine to me... (I found out why, later that night) I had Bountiful Baskets on Saturday morning and it was my week to be in charge, so at 10:00 I started printing out all the reports and paperwork I would need. I was IN bed ready to crash by 11:00, and was excited that I'd be able to get 7 hours of sleep! It was not meant to be. by 11:30 Katrina was throwing up. she was up and down all night. Caleb also woke up 2 or 3 times, for drinks, tummy hurting, wanting mommy to sleep with him, you name it... it was NOT FUN!
I got up at 6 and finished getting my stuff ready to go. Got to BB (late, I might add) and found that I had not been firing on all cylinders when getting things ready - - I had forgotten several things... but nothing we couldn't handle, thank heavens. Got home from baskets at 10, to find Caleb now throwing up too.

On Friday, a neighbor had given us a turtle, but we needed to get a good home fro him. he was just in a big plastic bin... I found a great deal on an aquarium online, and the guy called back Saturday morning and said we could come get it - right then... so Aaron and I went out and bought a new aquarium, then went to the pet store to buy the special UVB bulb and water filter we needed, then hauled everything back home. We then spent the next hour + setting the tank up. I think it looks cool and Aaron loves it - so that's all good I guess. (Tim is ready to disown me for allowing yet another animal into the menagerie.)

So there I was... 2:30 in the afternoon, house of sick people and messy messy MESS everywhere... No nap for me! I listened to the BYU football game while I cleaned the kitchen. (Total bummer of a game, but I did get my kitchen clean, all the way to mopping the floor... so it's not ALL bad!) By this point in the afternoon, Tim was feeling sick too...

I then went out to rent a carpet cleaner, cause Trina has gotten horribly stinky vomit all over her carpet and the room just REEKED! It was so NASTY! I got her room done (smells MUCH better today, and I'll do an second run tomorrow before I return the machine) and the downstairs family room done. (it is the room where we finally put in the new carpet... and the very next week jasmine peed on it. dumb dog! It will need a second run tomorrow too...) I'm also hoping to do a once over on the carpet in the front room before taking it back... but we'll see how much I can actually get done!

SO - I collapsed into bed last night at 10:30 and was instantly OUT! I don't think anyone woke up during the night. If they did - I slept through it!

Today I had to be at church early to practice with the ward choir as we were singing today, then 3 hours of church (Tim was still not feeling well, so he stayed home with the sick kids) After church it was a quick lunch, then off to choir practice. I ran home, grabbed my music, then drove around to pick up all the kids in my children's choir. (9 of them) no, I didn't have quite that many seat belts... shhhh! don't tell! We practiced at the church so that they were already there at 4:30 when we had a primary training meeting. My sweet little choir sang the opening song. They did "Teacher, Do You Love Me?", with a handful of teachers singing the teachers part. I thought they did a great job and really invited the spirit into the meeting. Then the children went home and I stayed for the rest of the meeting. Home at 4:45, and luckily for me, my friend Holly brought us over some dinner so I wouldn't have to cook. I just feel bad - with so many sick people, only and Aaron and I ate much. I should have just told her not to worry about it and Aaron and I could have eaten leftovers. Oh well - her soup was way more yummy than leftovers!

Now the dishwashers is running, table is wiped off, Aaron's done his learning technic exercises, kids (except Caleb, who is still wandering around) are tucked in bed and I am almost done writing in my "journal... aka blog. Then I am going to BED! Although I did get a pretty good nights sleep last night, I figure two in a row would be sheer bliss!!! so that's what I'm going for.

If you made it this far - thanks for lending an empathetic ear.

Here's hoping the bug quickly passes from our house and we can go back to normal life. (still crazy, but without the BARF!)

Ok - I lied. Apparently all those kids that were tucked in, un-tucked themselves and are still awake. I've now sent them off to bed again - and now I think it is safe to say that this day (and this weekend) is DONE!

an inspirational conference: part 4 (last one)

2010-09-15T22:25:00.002-06:00

So - the final speaker was President Boyd K. Packer. He kind of jumped around a lot, but here are a few things that stood out...

in questioning when he had done "enough" and could give up on a particularly disruptive boy in his seminary class, "What if that boy was YOUR son?"

The Lord's voting for you, Satan's voting against you, you have the deciding vote...

The devil can't make you do anything. can only entice, he has his limits and can only do what we let him do - only has the power we let him have.

We should pattern our lives in a way that Satan can't be in it. develop self-control and eliminate negative influences.

"Are you so touchy that you don't like to be corrected?"

"The easy times are in the past" - he mentioned this several times, recalled the pioneer stories already shared and said that it was harder now. that we must be strong and faithful.

I think it is interesting when we compare the pioneer hardships with our current challenges. they are both hard. but very different. I think the biggest difference is that they battled constantly with PHYSICAL things. Today we are battling more against spiritual and moral issues. (I always thing of the scripture about putting on the armor of God, "For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.")

In those days it was a daily battle to stay alive. Now it is a daily battle to keep your head straight about what is right and wrong. To somehow see through all of Satan's lies and deceptions. We are bombarded on all sides with "political correctness," and "tolerance" (which turns rapidly into failure to stand up for anything on any sort of moral basis). I watched how torn apart many people (in the church) became over the prop 8 thing in California. People, GOOD people, seriously didn't know which way was "right" -
* defending the moral position that marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that Procreation (sexual relations) is sacred and must only take place between a married man and woman. (the family:a proclamation to the world)
or
* defending people's right to exercise their "agency" to live in a manner that is in opposition to this moral position.

Talk about the lines between black and white, right and wrong, becoming so blurred that it is difficult to know which side to be on. I was on the debate team in High school (love it!) and I actually really enjoyed the challenge of defending a point of view that I (personally) didn't actually agree with. I can honestly understand how good, faithful, temple recommend holding members, could be on BOTH sides of this issue and feel that they were "right" and the other side is "Wrong."

In Isaiah chapter 5 we read:
20 Woe unto them that call evil good, and good evil; that put darkness for light, and light for darkness; that put bitter for sweet, and sweet for bitter!

21Woe unto them that are wise in their own eyes, and prudent in their own sight!

22Woe unto them that are mighty to drink wine, and men of strength to mingle strong drink:

23Which justify the wicked for reward, and take away the righteousness of the righteous from him!

I believe that THIS is why we are living in more difficult times... back then, right and wrong were more defined. Roles were more defined. moral boundaries (even among the varied religions) were defined and expected. In our day, are absolutely fulfilling the prophesy of Isaiah - that people call good evil and evil good.

I believe President's Packer's message of warning is that we MUST know the difference between right and wrong and we MUST chose the right. This is not something can be done sporadically or haphazardly. It requires faith, diligence, Study and prayer, obedience, and perseverance. We can't give up on one another either.

Wow - I'm really going after this tonight... Just for the record, the one liners up at the top are the notes - everything else is just kinda what came rolling out of my brain tonight. I think perhaps I should calm down and go to bed.

G'nite!

an inspiring conference: part 3

2010-09-15T21:47:00.003-06:00

Before I jot down my impressions from Elder Holland's talk, here is one more quote from Sister Beck's talk - related to the computer thing from part one. I didn't actually write this one down, but another of my friends did, and since Harmony - you were wishing you could have taken notes, I thought I'd pass this along just in case it would have been a writer-downer for you. "The computer is just a tool, no more important than the dishwasher or washing machine." (if only I were so addicted to the dishwasher and washing machine. my life would be much "cleaner.")

OK - now on to Elder Holland's talk.

He shared some pioneer stories, one about a family (the smith's maybe) who were in that first group who went through the hole in the rock... and then another family called to leave their comfortable home in Nephi to settle the "muddy." (don't remember their names, it obviously wasn't important enough for me to write the name down...)

Anyway - after sharing these stories, he said, "There are still waste places to settled." I don't remember the exact next words, but in essence, the barren waste places of our hearts. We must be committed to the Lord and when he calls - we answer int he affirmative. he said we must:

1st - Nurture your own physical and spiritual strength, THEN

2) build your family and 3) serve the church.

He said that "the world is getting more and more wicked and will try the very best of us." when those troubled and trying times come, we will have to reach deep down to find the faith and strength to endure. When those times come we need to know that we have something "deep down" that we can draw upon.

"it is more important to be simple and deep, than complex and superficial."

Ok - those are my basic notes, now my impressions:

I talk BIG. I "do," not so big...

I think how awesome it would be to be "called" to pack up and move to Jackson county... but I find it hard to answer the "call" to read my scriptures daily.

I imagine in my minds eye how quickly I would obey if the time ever came that the leaders of the church issue the call to leave the cities and establish "tent cities"in the hills. yet I can't seem to find the will to attend the temple (15 minutes away) on a regular basis.

I profess to be SO glad to have a living prophet and apostles to guide me in my life, yet when is last time I read their words from the last conference? (I'm guessing May, right after the Ensign came out.)

You get the idea... My heart will simply become more and more of a wasteland, unless I heed the call of the prophet and apostles. It is not enough to "act" the part. I need to BE the part. I need to exercise the faith and the discipline to truly be a disciple of Christ. I need to start with ME. and I need to start NOW!

an inspiring conference part 2

2010-09-14T22:23:00.002-06:00

Here I am, it's 10:30 at night and I am SO ready for bed! Where did my day go???? (i can only tell you that it did NOT all go into mindless computer drivel. :)

I was planning to report on my feelings and prompting from the next talk, the one by Elder Holland, but as I pulled out my notes (yes, I went downstairs to get them...) I saw another note that I jotted down from Sister Beck's talk and I think I'll talk briefly about it. It will be faster - so I can get to bed sooner, and it will serve to record it (aka journal) so I can review when needed.

She quoted some scriptures from 3 Nephi 20, about the Lord saying he will make his people, and he will consecrate His people, (and more stuff along those lines that I didn't write down). Then she said that we can choose to align ourselves with the Lord's house and the Lord's people. This we can do through "prioritization and precision" - NOT "perfection."

It is so easy to get caught up in perfectionism. People who come into my house may never guess that I struggle with this most depressing and paralyzing P word... I certainly don't have a "perfect" house (quite the opposite in fact, pretty much a constant state of CHAOS)... what they may not recognize is that I fall into the category of perfectionism where if I think I don't have the "time," "skills," "means," "desire"...(pick your term) to do it RIGHT, (and PERFECT) I just don't bother doing anything at all. Trust me when I tell you that this is not really a good way to make progress - in anything! The Lord's message to me was to prioritize and put HIM first. Just taking small, imperfect, baby steps... doing those small and simply baby steps with precision - not seeking to be perfect, but seeking instead to be constant and steadfast.

I did pretty well with the computer thing today. Still challenging.

an inspiring conference: part 1

2010-09-13T21:31:00.005-06:00

Yesterday our stake took part in a regional (or maybe it was an "area") conference. I heard many things that I NEEDED to hear. My notes from the conference are downstairs, and quite frankly, I am too tired to trek down to get them, so I am just going to go from memory.

I really enjoy listening to Sister Julie B Beck speak. She has given some super - powerhouse talks in recent years, that have truly spoken to my soul. The talk she gave on Sunday was another to add to my heart's collection.

She began by telling us that while she has been studying and praying in preparation for her talk, she hadn't been able to "write" one; so she was going to just share the thoughts and feelings she has been going over in her mind.
First off, she felt inspired to say , "you are doing better than you think you are." (boy, I sat up and listened to this one. I needed to hear that, since I often feel that I am doing so "not great.") Then she took a deep breathe and said, "even as I say that you are doing better than you think you are... we CAN do and be better."
This really resonated with me. I have a tendency to beat myself up about a whole lot of stuff, when in reality, the Savior loves me and has atoned for me, and HE accepts me JUST AS I AM. However, He is not well pleased when I spent time wallowing in self-doubt instead of humbly acknowledging shortcomings and working to move forward.

She then went on to mention people who are allowing the distractions of life to get in the way of what is really important. She mentioned specifically young mothers... and while I am not a "young mother," (I'm pushing 40, for crying out loud!) I am the mother of YOUNG children, and I am CERTAIN she was speaking to me, since it cut right to my heart...) She specifically mentioned time spent on the computer - wasting your time and taking time away from those young children and families.

I decided that this was something I needed to change in my life. Here at my house, the computer is on ALL day long. I check it in the morning, then I piddle around the house a little, always coming back at regular and frequent intervals to see if any emails have come through, or any facebook chatter I just HAVE to get in on, or any comments on my own facebook status, or play a few (hundred) games of bejeweled blitz, or...or...or (you get the idea)

SO - I made a new goal for myself. I can be on the computer for (roughly) 30 minutes in the morning and roughly) 30 minutes again in the evening after the kids are in bed. The time in between... the computer goes OFF and stays OFF. I went through some withdrawal pains today, but I did pretty well. One slight "fall off the wagon" moment when I had to get on the computer to print out some stuff for Aaron's homework, and while I was ON, I could hardly NOT check my email... right??? but over all I cut my computer time WAY WAY down today... and I believe it was a step in the right direction.

more conference notes to follow... but I am EXHAUSTED and need to go to bed!

more summer memories...

2010-08-28T13:58:00.012-06:00

For the 24th of July, we went up to Payson Lakes to hang out with my brother Shayne, his wife Angela, and their 4 kids. They took up their camper and stayed overnight, but Tim had to work (a 1/2 day), plus we had too many things going on the next day, so we just went up for the afternoon/evening. We spent the afternoon swimming in the lake and paddling around in our little inflatable raft (no pictures of that - but never fear, I more than made up for it in other meaningless pictures)
There at the lake they have a pier built out over the water that CRAZY people jump off. Paige had mentioned that she "might" want to do it, but was too scared to go alone. I walked over to provide moral support, and to everyone's surprise, (my own especially) I JUMPED! Multiple times even. And just so you know, anyone who tells you that the first time is the worst and then it isn't scary anymore - - they are lying to you! (at least if you are as scared of heights as I am... it never got any less scary - but I kept jumping, and it was kind of fun... in a terrifying freakish sort of way)

The lighting was behind us, so the pictures of us jumping aren't great, but they are proof that we did it, so here they are: (and if you click on them to see them bigger, you can see the details a lot better...)

A shadow-faced Katrina - but she's still my beautiful little princess!

Away goes Aaron! (he was the bravest and went first!!!)

Seth taking the plunge

Aaron "helping" Seth jump
and here goes Paige!

Now it's my turn. I won't even tell you how many pictures there are of me in this pose. Tim was standing on shore taking the pictures and I'd count to three, (at which point I was SUPPOSED to let go), he'd snap a picture, but I'd still be hanging on for dear life. He got a mite frustrated with me before I finally let go.

I finally let go, and here I am, dropping to the water - not graceful in way shape or form - but I did it!
And I very NON-gracefully hit the water!

Here we are - the PROUD and successful jumpers! (we were supposed to all jump together, but I chickened out and ended up letting go last... again)

Tim obviously has no fear! He stood ON the railing around the pier and leapt into the air. (The first time he counted to 3 even...)

After swimming, we went up to the camp and ate a yummy dinner and visited until it was long past my kids bedtime. It is just so beautiful and relaxing that I had a really hard time leaving. I was SO wishing I had decided to stay overnight... Oh well - maybe next year!

Shayne Angela and I

Spencer, Aaron and Seth roasting marshmallows

Bryan is my sticky little Marshmallow addict!

Caleb is quickly becoming a marshmallow master
Aaron and his perfectly toasted marshmallow

Summer Highlights

2010-08-19T10:46:00.006-06:00

It would be impossible for me to go back through and really catch up on everything that's been going on this summer, but I thought maybe I do a couple of "highlights" posts...

One of the stand out days for us this summer was when my sister came down from MT and we all went up to Lagoon. It was Tim and I with our 4 kids, plus Laura & Damon and their 5 kids, plus my brother Mike and his wife Rachael. (we were sorry that Mark and Corinne (and Brynlee and Landon couldn't make it)

We went on THE PERFECT day! The weather was just right - not chilly, not hot. The lines were SHORT all day. The people going on the "big kid rides" had to wait a tiny bit, but in "kiddie land" - the kids practically walked onto every ride. They never had to wait more than one cycle before it was their turn. I'm not kidding! We went on the log ride 3 or 4 times in a row - just got off, ran around and pretty much hopped right back on. We did the same on Rattlesnake Rapids - I think word got out though, because after our 4th (or 5th) ride, there was starting to be a line... Granted, it was still only a 5-10 minute wait time line, but after NO line... we decided we were good and off went went to do other stuff.

Along with the great weather and no lines - we had the PERFECT group of people. It is a pain to be "stuck" in kiddie land all by yourself all day, but since Laura and I were there together, it was really nice. we watched the kids ride and we got to laugh and visit. The kids all had little "buddies" that were their size to ride with. They just loved all the cousin time. While Laura and I were with the little kids, there were plenty of grown ups to take the older boys on the other rides (and keep track of them all). Mike and Rachael are roller-coaster riders so there was nothing they wouldn't take the kids on. The older cousins each had a buddy, or there were enough adults that on scary rides any kids that wanted to sit by an adult could. It was WONDERFUL! It could not have been a better day!

Here are a few of the MANY photos we took that day:

and what day at Lagoon would be complete without playing at least once in the fountain???

a new and positive (and kind of "out there") experience

2010-08-17T06:28:00.006-06:00

So - I had an interesting experience last week. As those of you who know me are well aware (and those who only know me via this blog are also probably aware) I have been having a really tough time with life for quite a while now. (one of the reasons I never blog) I've been struggling with so many little things that all add up to ... well, I don't know what they add up to, math was never my strong point - but it has NOT been fun! (or good, or healthy)
I have seriously considered (many times) going to the Dr and starting up on some type of anti-depression or anti-anxiety medication. I really do believe that there are times and circumstances where that IS the answer... however, I just never got the feeling that it was the RIGHT answer for me. I have been searching (rather haphazardly and slowly, but I'm blaming that on the depression) for what IS the right answer for me right now.

Several months ago I came across "Calyco Healing" - a modality of "energy healing." I felt drawn to learn more about it. Back in June I attended an LDS holistic living conference, and I went to a couple classes taught by Carolyn Cooper, the founder of Calyco. I continued to feel strongly that this was something that had the potential to help me and that I needed to look into. Last week I finally met with Nathalie , a practitioner in my area, and I had a really positive experience. As those of you who have read my blog for a long time, may recall that a couple of years ago I tried another "healer" type person, (not calyco) but the positive feelings were fleeting - at best.

There is no way I can go into detail into the things that were "cleared" during my session last week - too hard to explain and too lengthy to read if I did try to write it out, (this post is already SUPER LONG), but I found it very interesting AND beneficial. One thing that she tested was to discover my "birth issue." The basic premise with this is that when we are born, whatever emotions are prevalent in the room when we take that first "breathe of life" become a part of us, and we tend to hold on to the belief that those are the emotions that "life" is supposed to be made of. (my inadequate words) So what were "my" birth issues or feelings?

feeling overwhelmed and burdened.

Yup - that pretty much sums up my life. SO often that is how I feel about life. Completely OVERWHELMED and that everything is just another burden to be carried. She "cleared" those negative emotions (plus MANY others) during the session.

While I was there, I can't say that I felt any huge "release" or "lightening" of my troubles, yet as I drove home, I recognized that I FELT better. (it had been a SUPER rough day at home with the kids - and yet I felt energized and ready to go back home and be with them) When I got home, I found I was able to handle everything they threw at me. The messes of the house didn't freak me out. I seriously didn't feel completely overwhelmed by the sight of the dishes in the sink, and spilled cereal on the floor, and the kids fighting. When the kids were in bed and I went in to my own bed and saw the mountain of laundry there, I didn't feel bad about it, or overwhelmed by it, I just was able to sit down and fold for a while - no negative feelings added. It was a really nice feeling - and I made note of it.

So now... 6 days later??? how do I feel?

STILL BETTER! I feel better. I feel more able to separate myself from situations and consciously make the choice how I am going to react to it. I feel less like I "have to" do all the stuff I am "supposed to do." I feel more free to ENJOY time with my kids. We went camping last week to try to have better viewing of the meteor shower, and while the stress of getting everything ready and packed was still there, and I still got uptight and tense and a little short with people, I was able to release those feelings as soon as we were in the car and on our way - instead of them hanging over me for HOURS into the trip (And sometimes into the next day... like they have in the past)

I don't understand how it works, and I'm not saying that life is all roses and chocolate now - it's still life. There's still sibling conflict, and messes, and dishes, and laundry, and stress, and meals to prepare, and and and - - but it is BETTER. I am going back to see Nathalie again today - this time taking my son, Aaron. He struggles with so many things - one of which is depression. I started taking him to see a counselor a couple weeks ago, and I was surprised as to the depth of his pain and sadness. I had no idea he was struggling so much. I am really hopefully that the combination of ME taking care of MY stuff + a session of energy healing to take care of HIS stuff + counseling to help him know how to learn new skills will equal a happier, healthier child who is able to handle life's challenges and enjoy life to the fullest.

One last thing - Once a negative emotion is released, it leaves a void that must be filled with a positive, or else the negative belief (habitual) will just move right back in. Here are two of my new "replacement" beliefs:

I am learning to be a great mother - one step at a time!
Being a mother is a beautiful thing!